The Withered Tree Always Welcomes Spring chapter 60

Shen Jixue moved too quickly for Chen Xian to react, and the room fell silent again.

The kiss was light, almost fleeting, but Chen Xian still felt the shape of Shen Jixue’s lips.

If… if Shen Jixue hadn’t pulled away so quickly, Chen Xian thought he would have pushed him away. He consoled himself this way, thinking if a lukewarm kiss would make Shen Jixue stop, he wouldn’t mind too much.

The room was silent, and the night market outside had dispersed. Only the faint moonlight shone through the curtains.

A warm breath brushed past Chen Xian’s earlobe, making the hair on his neck stand on end. Just as he was about to turn around, Shen Jixue kissed him again. This time, he didn’t pull away quickly, leaving his lips pressed against Chen Xian’s neck.

Chen Xian’s entire body stiffened, his heartbeat pounding in his ears. He could feel Shen Jixue’s lips moving slightly with each breath.

“Chen Xian.” After the kiss, Shen Jixue propped himself up slightly. “Why didn’t you push me away?”

Chen Xian felt like he had been caught. Even though Shen Jixue was the one misbehaving, he always seemed so righteous. Why did he always feel guilty when questioned by him?

“I like you. If you don’t reject me, and you don’t resist when I kiss you, I’ll really get the wrong idea.”

Shen Jixue’s voice was low and hoarse, making Chen Xian’s heart itch. It was a stark contrast to his youthful and innocent face.

Chen Xian held back for a long time before finally muttering, “Don’t do this.”

“Do what?” Shen Jixue pretended not to understand. “Kiss you?”

Shen Jixue was not only aggressive but also brutally straightforward. He talked about liking and kissing without any shyness, his youthful spirit and body full of life.

“Have you never kissed before? Not even with your ex-wife?” Shen Jixue, tired of propping himself up, leaned on Chen Xian’s arm, speaking lazily as if discussing something ordinary.

Chen Xian was at a loss for words, letting out a few helpless breaths, unable to discuss such an embarrassing topic with Shen Jixue.

But Shen Jixue, not content with this, pressed on, “Really never kissed?”

“You…”

It seemed like a matter of male pride. If he didn’t answer, it felt like Shen Jixue would look down on him.

Of course, he had kissed before, but if he had to recall, the last time he kissed was with Jiang Ying at their wedding banquet. It was so long ago he couldn’t remember the details.

At the wedding banquet, with a hall full of guests, he should have been happy. But kissing in front of everyone, he had felt awkward and reserved.

It was too long ago; he couldn’t remember.

“Me?”

He took a deep breath. “I don’t remember. Marriage is about living life. Which couple kisses for no reason?”

People like them were reserved, introverted, restrained, and controlled in their emotions. Even if they liked someone deeply, they wouldn’t express it openly.

“Did you kiss her, or did she kiss you?” Shen Jixue’s words were sharp and unrelenting.

Chen Xian felt his blood rushing to his head. His ears buzzed. Did Shen Jixue really need to get to the bottom of this?

“I told you… I don’t remember…” Chen Xian felt a wave of helplessness wash over him.

But Shen Jixue seemed not to hear. “Did you kiss her?”

Chen Xian sighed inwardly. This was like a child asking their parents how they were born—impossible to answer. He realized that staying silent wouldn’t work with Shen Jixue. As long as he didn’t answer, Shen Jixue would keep pressing, never giving up.

“Yes.” Chen Xian responded perfunctorily. Who kissed whom wasn’t important to him; he just wanted to brush off Shen Jixue.

Unexpectedly, Shen Jixue, who had been aggressive just moments ago, suddenly fell silent. Chen Xian heard him exhale heavily. He thought Shen Jixue was going to say something shocking again, but instead, he said nothing.

Suspiciously, he glanced back at Shen Jixue. In the dim room, he could still see his unhappy expression.

“Why are you sighing?” he asked. “I answered you, didn’t I? Why are you still unhappy?”

“How can I be happy if you kissed her? You’ve never kissed me.” Shen Jixue pouted. “When I took the initiative to kiss you, you told me not to.”

Chen Xian opened his mouth in shock, finding his voice only after a long moment. He stammered, “That… It was at my wedding with her… Wasn’t that…normal?”

Trying to explain only made it worse.

Shen Jixue deliberately exploited the loophole, “You two? And that’s normal.”

“Why… why can’t you grasp the main point… I’m saying at the time…”

“That is the main point,” Shen Jixue relaxed his shoulders and moved closer to Chen Xian, asking, “Do you still like her?”

The closeness made Chen Xian instinctively shrink back. Shen Jixue hadn’t even found his position properly, yet Chen Xian still wanted to avoid him.

“This isn’t about liking or not… Marriage isn’t about constantly saying ‘I love you’… It’s just…”

“Just what?” Shen Jixue pressed. Seeing that Chen Xian couldn’t articulate a coherent answer, he continued, “If it’s not about love, then what is it? If you don’t like her, why get married?”

Chen Xian, frustrated, grabbed his head. “Do you think your parents got married out of love? Adults sometimes marry because…”

“Of course they did.” Shen Jixue’s response was firm. “My parents were one of the rare couples in our hometown who married for love.”

Though not affluent and facing hardships, Shen Jixue’s parents had a loving relationship until his mother’s death, making his family environment warm and loving.

“Wasn’t that the case for you too?”

Shen Jixue’s barrage of questions made Chen Xian dizzy and ashamed. His previous marriage had been a rational choice.

“I wasn’t as lucky as your parents. For me, it was more about responsibility.”

“You didn’t love her.”

After all that, Shen Jixue summed it up in one sentence. Yet, on reflection, he wasn’t entirely wrong, just not absolutely right.

Chen Xian lowered his eyes and sighed, neither admitting nor denying it.

“And what about me? You don’t have any responsibility towards me. What is it with me, just kindness?”

Chen Xian couldn’t answer. He was confused.

Shen Jixue didn’t force him to answer. “I’m going to the hospital tomorrow. If all goes well, I’ll be there for quite a while.”

“Don’t worry. I’m not going out to sea anytime soon. I’ll visit you in the hospital whenever I can. Just focus on getting better.”

Shen Jixue didn’t doubt Chen Xian’s promise. “It’s going to be a long time. I wonder if, during that time, someone else might like you.”

Chen Xian laughed. “Do you think I’m some hot commodity? People might not even notice me.”

Shen Jixue’s perception of him was idealized. Chen Xian felt he wasn’t the type to attract attention based on looks. In a crowd, he’d blend in and be forgotten.

In Shen Jixue’s mind, Chen Xian was desirable. He never imagined him as particularly handsome or dazzling but was still irresistibly drawn to him.

Chen Xian would never understand.

“Kiss me.”

“What?” Shen Jixue’s straightforward request almost made Chen Xian bite his tongue. He couldn’t comprehend how Shen Jixue could make such a request so openly.

Shen Jixue wasn’t embarrassed. “Just fulfill my last wish before I go to the hospital. Kiss me, and I won’t bother you tonight.”

It seemed reasonable. From Shen Jixue’s mouth, it sounded like Chen Xian was getting a good deal.

He stared at Shen Jixue’s shadow, lost in thought. He weighed the “deal” in his mind. If he kissed Shen Jixue, Shen Jixue would leave him alone tonight.

It seemed… worth it. He could finally breathe easy.

In the darkness, Shen Jixue remained a vague silhouette. Chen Xian reached out to touch his nose, feeling the warmth of his skin.

Hesitating for a moment, he leaned in towards Shen Jixue, gradually sensing his breath and feeling Shen Jixue’s tension.

Shen Jixue, always composed, was at this moment nervous. Why ask for a kiss if he was so nervous?

Chen Xian extended his arm, placing his hand on top of Shen Jixue’s head. The trembling stopped. Shen Jixue, puzzled, touched Chen Xian’s hand.

“Are you not going to kiss me?”

“What are you thinking?” Chen Xian pressed down on Shen Jixue’s head, suppressing his own wild heartbeat. He almost considered kissing Shen Jixue, using it as a way to quiet him down for the night.

Shen Jixue slapped away Chen Xian’s hand and pounced directly towards him. Chen Xian instinctively caught him, and they rolled onto the bed together, with Shen Jixue pressing down on him, refusing to get up.

“I thought you were really going to kiss me.”

Chen Xian gently pushed against Shen Jixue’s arms. Finding that he couldn’t push him away, he gave up struggling and let Shen Jixue hug him.

“Chen Xian,” Shen Jixue called out earnestly, “you like me, don’t you? Not out of responsibility like Jiang Ying, and not out of sympathy for me. You like me and want to be with me.”

Unbelievable, where else could you find someone like Shen Jixue?

Chen Xian pulled the blanket over them, hugging Shen Jixue and moving them to the pillow, without answering Shen Jixue’s question. “Sleep, we have to go to the hospital tomorrow.”

Realizing that Chen Xian really wouldn’t kiss him, Shen Jixue finally gave up and settled down.

After a long while, his breathing steadied, and his full weight pressed down on Chen Xian. Chen Xian moved him to the side, then studied his face in the moonlight, his fingers unconsciously tracing Shen Jixue’s cheeks and finally resting on his lips.

A wave of indescribable sourness welled up inside him. He tapped Shen Jixue’s lips with his fingertip and then fell asleep.