Reverse Domestication chapter 108
He painted a swallow on him
Qi Yanbai had once said that an artist’s work is a reflection of their self-consciousness. To understand the work is to understand the artist’s heart.
Lu Ye had only partially understood this before, thinking it was a professional skill of those within the industry. However, it wasn’t until now that he discovered that this statement was actually true.
“Do you think he’s willing to live such a plain life forever?” Qi Zhe said, turning his head slightly to look at the massive life-sized oil painting behind him. His gaze was complex and deep, not as if he was looking at artwork but more like he was peering through the thick frame in front of him, trying to see the deepest corners of Qi Yanbai’s soul.
“Every artist is a madman,” Qi Zhe said. “The desire to create nurtures their emotions, amplifies their desires—his inspiration is born out of love, and in the end, it will go out of control due to love.”
The paintings on the wall continued to stand quietly in their place. The vibrant paints, mixed with an unknown substance, shimmered under the light, and the striking red imprints changed with the shadows, casting a glittering light, resembling a flowing stream of blood.
Lu Ye glanced at Qi Yanbai and noticed that he hadn’t noticed him. He was also looking at the painting in silence.
“He’s long regarded you as his possession,” Qi Zhe said, looking at Lu Ye with a pitying gaze. His tone was calm as he continued, “He has the deepest and most malicious possessiveness towards you. He wants to invade you, defile you, control you—and he wants to possess you forever.”
Qi Zhe’s words were quite sharp and carried a strong sense of insult, but this time, Qi Yanbai didn’t immediately rush out to refute him, like a cat whose tail had been stepped on. Instead, he paled and avoided Lu Ye’s gaze, remaining silent.
Lu Ye was all too familiar with this expression on Qi Yanbai’s face—whenever he felt guilty, he would avoid eye contact in this manner, as if he believed that as long as he couldn’t see it, he wouldn’t have to face Lu Ye’s disappointment.
Perhaps it was because he had been looking at the painting for a long time, but now Lu Ye seemed somewhat immune. The features of the figure in the painting gradually blurred under the shifting shadows, and the bright red imprints became even more noticeable.
Twisted lines formed a pattern-like name, and Lu Ye narrowed his eyes slightly as he looked at the faint yet large character “Qi.” He felt goosebumps creeping up his back.
Mad artists, Lu Ye thought, were always full of surprises. They could always spring unexpected “surprises” on him. Not satisfied with being the abductor, Qi Yanbai now wanted to be the master.
However, Lu Ye had some subtle male chauvinism ingrained in him. He adhered to the principle of “not embarrassing his loved ones in front of outsiders.” Regardless of whether Qi Yanbai was right or wrong, he wouldn’t stand against Qi Yanbai in front of Qi Zhe.
Anything that didn’t stand right with him were things he could discuss privately with Qi Yanbai behind closed doors. There was no need to make a spectacle of himself in front of Qi Zhe.
So he didn’t argue with Qi Zhe about the authenticity of this matter, nor did he challenge Qi Yanbai openly with questions like, “What do you really think of me?” He simply withdrew his gaze from the painting and uttered a casual “Oh.”
“So?” Lu Ye asked.
“So?” Qi Zhe seemed to have not expected Lu Ye to choose to ignore the current facts. He raised an eyebrow slightly and spoke, seemingly dissatisfied and a little disdainful, “So, the conditions I’ve given are actually the most suitable for him.”
By using generous amounts of money to bind Lu Ye to Qi Yanbai and making him depend on Qi Yanbai for survival while exchanging love and inspiration for a comfortable life, this was indeed the safest and most satisfying approach for Qi Yanbai.
If this had been a year ago, Qi Yanbai would have unquestionably accepted this proposal. He might even have stood on Qi Zhe’s side, persuading Lu Ye to embrace this “favorable” way of life.
But now, he was no longer willing.
Artists were demanding and greedy. Qi Yanbai had already tasted the warmth from Lu Ye and was unwilling to return to the cold “mutual benefit” arrangement.
“You don’t have to say more,” Qi Yanbai suddenly spoke. “I admit that everything you’ve said is correct—I am greedy, hypocritical, and my desires for him are insatiable.”
Lu Ye turned his gaze toward Qi Yanbai.
Qi Yanbai still didn’t look at him. Instead, he spoke to Qi Zhe, “But it doesn’t matter—I’ll do my best to control myself. When the day comes that I can’t control myself anymore, I’ll hand the decision over to him, to determine if I’m still worth saving.”
“I’m willing to teach children the basics of art for a lifetime, and I’m willing to live an ordinary life for a lifetime, enduring the hardships of an ordinary person,” Qi Yanbai clenched his teeth, as if issuing a final ultimatum, and also as if decisively cutting off his past.
“I’m willing to stay here and paint apples for a lifetime if needed , even if my desires consume me. I want to die by his side,” he said.
In the end, Qi Zhe didn’t reach a consensus with Qi Yanbai, and he seemed quite upset. He didn’t say a word and turned to leave.
Ashley followed a step behind him, gracefully draping herself in her coat. When she reached the door, she turned back to Lu Ye, throwing him a flirtatious glance, and half-heartedly apologized, “I’m really sorry; he’s always like this.”
“It’s okay,” Lu Ye said, seeming nonchalant. “But I suppose he won’t be coming back, will he?”
“He probably won’t,” Ashley said, her eyes narrowing. She smiled like a cunning cat. “Although he loves art, he’s not desperate enough to make a ‘third visit.’ You’ve made him quite angry today, so he probably won’t pay any attention to you anymore.”
“Well, that’s good,” Lu Ye exaggeratedly sighed with relief, keeping a straight face. “Entertaining someone like him is a real headache. I’d like to live a few more years.”
“Hmm,” a cool breeze swept through the corridor, and Ashley adjusted her coat collar. She pressed the elevator button, then turned to smile at Lu Ye. “You can relax now.”
She didn’t specify what he should relax about, and Lu Ye didn’t inquire further. They seemed to reach some subtle understanding between them in just a few words, demonstrating their mutual tacit understanding.
Qi Yanbai didn’t come out to see them off, but out of courtesy, Lu Ye escorted Ashley downstairs.
Qi Zhe had probably been genuinely upset; he didn’t even wait for Ashley. When Lu Ye and Ashley reached downstairs, Qi Zhe had already disappeared.
Ashley didn’t seem surprised by this. She wasn’t in a hurry to chase after Qi Zhe; instead, she stood downstairs and lit a cigarette without saying a word.
“You’re quite an impressive individual, Officer Lu,” Ashley said, holding a slender cigarette between her fingertips and smiling. “What we couldn’t achieve, you managed effortlessly.”
“It’s not too difficult,” Lu replied casually. “Love is not so complicated for ordinary people. All it takes is for him to believe in me.”
Perhaps this answer struck a chord with Ashley. She chuckled softly, then raised her head, lightly sweeping her long hair back over her shoulder.
“I can rest easy now,” Ashley said. “I’ll leave him entirely to you from now on, Officer Lu.”
She extended her hand as if making a gesture, her eyes slightly narrowed, and she added with profound meaning, “You must take good care of him.”
Lu Ye didn’t respond to that, merely shaking her hand briefly before letting go. He then glanced at their apartment up behind him and chuckled softly.
“Don’t be too confident,” Lu Ye said. “I’ll still have to settle accounts with him later.”
Ashley seemed to find his words amusing, and she burst into laughter, her laughter carrying a genuine flavor that reached her eyes and the corners of her mouth.
After laughing for a while, Ashley, having had her fill, flicked the cigarette ash off her finger, sighed in relief, and smiled.
“I have many vacation plans for the future, so I probably won’t be coming back,” Ashley said. “Goodbye for now, Officer Lu. I wish you both a long and happy life together.”
When Lu Ye returned, Qi Yanbai was still standing in the studio, maintaining the same posture as before, quietly gazing at the painting.
The display light, previously knocked askew by Qi Zhe, had been returned to its original position. The features of the person in the painting had become slightly clearer, once again revealing a familiar face.
Lu Ye walked over to him, also looking up at the painting. He asked with an ambiguous tone, “Yanbai, did you really want to leave a mark on me?”
The vivid red paint stung Qi Yanbai’s eyes. He blinked and, after a few seconds, slowly nodded.
“I did,” Qi Yanbai admitted. “During that time, I thought about leaving my mark on you countless times.”
Qi Yanbai had unknowingly buried his malicious intentions when he painted, only realizing it when Qi Zhe pointed it out. The brand in the painting had been drawn large and deep, as if seared with fire, leaving an indelible mark.
“And now?” Lu Ye asked. “Do you still want to?”
Qi Yanabai continued to gaze at the painting, and this time, his silence lasted even longer. It seemed like an internal struggle was taking place, a battle of conflicting emotions. After several moments, he let out a sigh, confessing, “Occasionally, I still have such thoughts.”
Lu Ye raised an eyebrow slightly, seemingly pleased with this answer. His eyebrows curved upwards, indicating his happiness.
“So honest?” Lu Ye asked in return.
“You said you wanted me to be honest, and I remember that,” Qi Yanbai said. “I don’t want to deceive you anymore, or deceive myself for that matter.”
He could have used a perfect, gentle answer to gloss over the situation, but he had finally removed the “time bomb” within himself. Regardless, Qi Yanbai didn’t want to carry the psychological burden of “deceiving Lu Ye” again.
Moreover, he didn’t want to experience the jealousy he inflicted upon himself anymore. He would rather face Lu Ye’s punishment and scolding than have Lu Ye fall in love with a false facade.
“I had nothing before back at home,” Qi Yanbai confessed. “Money was given by Qi Zhe, and painting was a tool to acquire resources. I lived in that house, but I didn’t feel a sense of belonging.”
“I had nothing until I met you,” Qi Yanbai said. “You are mine, so I always want to prove this point. However, it’s limited to just thinking about it; I won’t act on it.”
Qi Yanbai had learned restraint under Lu Ye’s influence and was no longer obsessed with satisfying every desire. For the current Qi Yanbai, becoming a “normal person” for Lu Ye had almost become a compulsory course.
“Is that so?” But Lu Ye seemed to have some objections to this answer. He reached out and lightly pinched Qi Yanbai’s chin, forcing him to raise his face and look at him. Then, he lowered his gaze and smiled gently at him.
“Then, do you still have paint left?” Lu Ye asked.
His topic had taken quite a leap, and Qi Yanbai blinked, not immediately understanding his intent. He cast a glance, subconsciously, at the paintbox in the corner of the studio.
People have their quirks when it comes to being stubborn. Lu Ye didn’t think Qi Yanbai’s previous actions could be easily justified, but he was willing to guide him onto the right path in a different way from now on.
Besides, Qi Yanbai had been exceptionally honest today. He had behaved so well that Lu Ye couldn’t help but want to reward him.
So, Lu Ye turned his back to Qi Yanbai, removing his shirt in front of him. The soft, gentle light from the display soon covered him, leaving a faint silver glow on the well-defined muscles of his body.
“Because of the nature of my work, I can’t get a tattoo,” Lu Ye explained. “But you can paint something on me.”
Qi Yanbai was momentarily stunned. It took him a few seconds to understand what Lu Ye meant. Then, he raised his head, looking at him with disbelief in his eyes.
Lu Ye didn’t say a word, just quietly watching him. His gaze was calm, not urging or teasing, but simply waiting, as if tacitly allowing Qi Yanbai to paint his body with colors.
Qi Yanbai was captivated by his gaze, and he knelt on one knee, extending his hand. He reached for the paintbox next to him, pulled out his most frequently used brush, and let the soft bristles touch Lu Ye’s skin, creating a slight, cool, tingling sensation.
Stroke by stroke, Qi Yanbai painted a white swallow on Lu Ye’s lower back. The lifelike white swallow seemed ready to take flight, surrounded by a few strands of wild grass, cradling it as it prepared to soar into the sky.
At the moment of completion, Qi Yanbai didn’t even realize it himself. He stared in astonishment at the white swallow, unable to believe it had come from his own hand.
Late at night, the display light’s glow flickered ever so slightly. Lu Ye stood in front of the life-sized oil painting, his expression neither sad nor happy. The soft, bright silver light from the display light flowed gently over his shoulders, extending the wilderness in the painting right before Qi Yanbai’s eyes.
Following the light, Qi Yanbai looked up and saw Lu Ye’s slightly lowered brows and eyes. At that moment, he felt as though Lu Ye had completely merged with the person in the painting.
For years, Qi Yanbai had been plagued by his inner demons, and no true “work” had emerged from him since then. It was only through Lu Ye that he had picked up his paintbrush again, but all he could paint were portraits of Lu Ye.
And among the many portraits of Lu Ye, this was the first time he had painted something other than Lu Ye himself.
The white swallow nestled against Lu Ye’s lower back, its outstretched wings rising and falling with Lu Ye’s breath, as if it would take flight at any moment and break free from its cage.
After some time, the brush slipped from Qi Yanbai’s hand, hitting the floor with a crisp sound as the white paint splattered onto the ground. His breathing gradually quickened, and his every exhalation carried a scorching, moist warmth. He placed both hands on Lu Ye’s waist, leaned in slightly, and lightly kissed the white swallow before turning his head to kiss the tail bone on Lu Ye’s lower back.
His kisses lingered for a while, and finally, they rested on Lu Ye’s neck.
Then, he lowered his head, pressing his forehead against his waist, as if he were worshiping a deity in his heart.
“…It seems like you’ve saved me once again,” Qi Yanbai’s eyes were burning hot, so he closed them, whispering softly, “How can I ever repay you?”