Want to Be with Him
The next day, Qin Mudong was leaving for training, so that night, they didn’t ride their bikes. Instead, they walked home slowly.
Both of them deliberately slowed their pace, because each step forward meant getting closer to parting.
Lu Xingjia tried to liven the mood, but it didn’t really work. Qin Mudong kept his eyes lowered slightly, seemingly deep in thought.
Eventually, even the slowest walk reaches its end.
Lu Xingjia stopped, took a deep breath in, then slowly exhaled.
“Good luck,” he said, forcing a smile.
Qin Mudong didn’t respond immediately.
Lu Xingjia knew he wasn’t in a good mood and was about to say something comforting when suddenly, Qin Mudong grabbed his wrist and hoarsely called, “Xingxing.” Lu Xingjia instinctively looked up—and saw the intense, inky look in Qin Mudong’s eyes.
At the entrance to the residential area, there was a small man-made scenic area with dense bamboo forming a miniature bamboo grove.
There weren’t many people around. Qin Mudong pulled him quickly behind the bamboo grove, and his cool lips crashed against Lu Xingjia’s.
The parked cars by the roadside and the bamboo grove behind them formed a kind of barrier, completely shutting out the outside world.
Under the dim streetlight, Qin Mudong kissed him deeply, yet with restraint.
Before he had him, he could endure the long loneliness.
But after tasting sweetness, even a moment of separation felt excruciating.
He didn’t know how to express this emotion, so he followed his instincts and chose the most primal way.
Qin Mudong wasn’t good with words, so he packed everything he wanted to say into that kiss. Lu Xingjia understood, and he did his best to respond, tangling their lips and tongues together.
Maybe geniuses really do have a talent for kissing—Lu Xingjia quickly lost the battle, panting hard, blushing all over, practically buried in Qin Mudong’s embrace.
When the kiss finally ended, neither of them let go. Lu Xingjia was still leaning against Qin Mudong’s chest, mumbling softly:
“Don’t stay up too late.”
“Eat properly.”
“Drink more warm water.”
“I know you’re careful…”
He paused, then lowered his voice, “But I’ll still worry.”
“Mm.” Qin Mudong let out a low chuckle, his chest gently shaking. His deep, magnetic voice in Lu Xingjia’s ear was especially tempting: “Wait for me.”
Then he kissed Lu Xingjia’s burning red ear.
Even after getting home, Lu Xingjia’s blush hadn’t faded. He caught He Xi stealing glances at him several times, her face written with open curiosity.
Feeling a bit guilty, he mumbled an excuse and hurried back to his room, shutting the door with a loud bang.
Looking at the closed door, He Xi sighed softly, but in the end said nothing.
…..
A month is short—just over four weeks. Just thirty days and nights, 720 hours, 43,200 minutes, and 2,592,000 seconds. It would pass quickly.
The new classmates in his class were easy to get along with. A month was enough for Lu Xingjia to blend in.
They walked home together after school, ate in the cafeteria together, played basketball on the playground, and studied together. But every time the night fell and he was alone in his room, Lu Xingjia would look up at the sky—at the stars almost hidden by heavy smog.
Some stars refused to give up. Even if shrouded in layers of haze, they still shone with all their might.
Lu Xingjia thought, Mudong Ge, can you see them? Your star is here with you.
…..
That day, like usual, Lu Xingjia was studying in the classroom. During morning reading, the room buzzed with students’ voices reciting texts.
But that day was different—because Qin Mudong was coming back.
Phones weren’t allowed during training, so they hadn’t contacted each other for a whole month.
Lu Xingjia had been counting the days, and finally—the day had come.
Today!
Murmuring his textbook, Lu Xingjia’s mind was already drifting.
Had Qin Mudong gained weight? Lost weight? Gotten tanned or pale? Had he missed him?
Of course he missed me… Then, will he kiss me as soon as he’s back?
Probably… But where? Too many people at the bike shed, too dark in the small grove—wait, what am I thinking?!
Lu Xingjia suddenly realized what he was imagining and blushed deeply. He cleared his throat twice and glanced to the side nervously.
His deskmate, the girl next to him, was focused on reading and hadn’t noticed anything. Her clear recitation made Lu Xingjia feel embarrassed, and he quickly picked up his book to read as well.
But he missed Qin Mudong too much. Even staying in class was an act of extreme restraint. After every class break, he couldn’t help sneaking out his phone to check for texts, then stepping into the hallway to glance downstairs, hoping to spot that familiar figure.
Finally, during the lunch break, his long-silent phone buzzed with a new message.
[I’m back.]Lu Xingjia’s heart skipped a beat—twice.
He bolted from the classroom, and the moment he stepped outside, he saw a familiar figure.
Just like the night they parted a month ago, the boy stood with his backpack slung over one shoulder, one hand in his pocket, leaning casually against the railing, expression calm yet deeply captivating.
“Xingxing,” he called softly.
“You’re back!”
People bustled through the corridor, and Lu Xingjia suppressed his urge to run up and hug him. Instead, he grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the small garden downstairs.
Just as they turned the corner at the stairwell, Qin Mudong yanked him into a tight embrace—just like Lu Xingjia had dreamed.
Lu Xingjia murmured softly, “This is the teaching building, you know…”
But he didn’t struggle at all—instead, he went along with it and reached out to hug him tightly.
It was bold—recklessly so. They could be discovered at any moment, but he couldn’t hold back any longer.
Luckily, it was lunch break, and the corridor by the little garden was deserted. They hugged in the hallway for quite a while, then smoothly shifted locations and sat down on the hanging carriage-style bench in the small garden.
The garden was spacious and sparsely populated, with thick shrubbery providing cover. At last, the two of them could sit and talk in peace.
For the past month, Lu Xingjia had come here almost every day at noon to feed the cats and fish. That tabby cat had visibly plumped up and wasn’t afraid of humans anymore. When it saw the two of them sitting there, it dashed over quickly, arching its back and rubbing against their legs repeatedly.
Lu Xingjia bent down to pet the cat with a smile, tilting his head slightly to look up at Qin Mudong. “Was the training tiring?”
“It was okay.”
“Were the questions hard?”
“They were okay.”
“How was the food?”
“Also okay.”
…
Why was every answer the same?
Lu Xingjia sat up and asked directly, “Did you miss me?”
“Mm.” Qin Mudong gave a soft hum in response.
That’s it?
None of what he expected happened. Lu Xingjia pouted, about to complain about how much he missed him, when he saw Qin Mudong unzip his backpack and pull out a glass jar.
Lowering his gaze and smiling faintly, with a touch of shyness, he handed it over. “This is for you.”
The jar was about the size of a palm, transparent, and filled with folded paper stars.
Lu Xingjia was taken aback. “You folded these?”
“Mm,” Qin Mudong said. “Every time I missed you, I folded one. Then it filled up.”
His tone was light, but the impact was powerful—irresistibly charming.
No, this wasn’t just charm. Qin Mudong had truly kept him in his heart. That’s why even his unconscious actions could move Lu Xingjia so deeply.
His heart grew soft and warm, and the little bit of hurt he had felt earlier vanished instantly. He raised the jar and shook it under the sunlight. The colorful paper stars shimmered brightly, more dazzling than any real stars he had ever seen.
“Thank you,” Lu Xingjia said softly. “They’re beautiful. I love them.”
Suddenly overcome with emotion, he leaned forward and quickly kissed the corner of Qin Mudong’s lips, then pulled back just as fast.
The gentle touch vanished in an instant. Qin Mudong’s throat bobbed as he pulled Lu Xingjia into his arms, mimicking his action with a kiss of his own. “My star is beautiful too.”
“I love him very much.”
…
The happier the time spent together, the harder the separation becomes.
Even though Qin Mudong had returned from training, it wasn’t yet the end.
The provincial team only gave them half a day off. Early the next morning, they were to regroup and head to a different city hundreds of kilometers away for the national competition. Originally, no one was allowed to return home for this break—but Qin Mudong had snuck back, meaning he had to leave again that same evening.
All in all, the only time they had together was this one noon break. Every minute, every second felt incredibly precious.
Lu Xingjia beamed brightly, chattering non-stop as he told Qin Mudong all about the past month—how the school had switched back to its winter schedule, how he did pretty well on his monthly exam, and how it seemed like a pair of wild ducks had made a home on school grounds, quacking away every evening…
Just as he reached the most exciting part of the story, the afternoon prep bell suddenly rang.
Lu Xingjia fell silent immediately, knowing exactly what that bell meant.
He had to go to class. Qin Mudong had to leave.
Qin Mudong’s expression turned cold, the smile fading from his lips.
After a moment, Lu Xingjia spoke again. “That was the prep bell.”
Qin Mudong lowered his gaze. “Yeah.”
Lu Xingjia hesitated for a bit, then lifted his signature smile and patted him on the shoulder. “Go on. Good luck in the finals.”
Qin Mudong quietly zipped up his backpack, slung it over his shoulder, and slowly walked toward the school gate alone—his figure lonely.
Suddenly, Lu Xingjia remembered something and chased after him, grabbing the hem of his shirt. “Are you… going alone?”
Qin Mudong stopped and turned to look at him, giving a soft “Mm.”
Lu Xingjia frowned. “Aunt Pu isn’t going with you?”
“She said she’s busy these couple of days.”
“Oh…” Lu Xingjia’s long lashes lowered, and a wave of ache surged in his heart.
Qin Mudong had probably been like this in his previous life too—earning glory alone, with no one to share it with.
Even though his mother’s attitude seemed to have changed this time around, she still hadn’t accompanied him to this milestone moment of his life.
Most competition candidates were the pride of their parents. Traveling out of town for a week-long final, most had their parents with them, arranging everything so the kids could just focus on the test. Seeing them all so happy and supported—would Qin Mudong feel lonely?
Of course he would.
At that moment, Lu Xingjia even had the urge to drop everything and go with him.
He knew Qin Mudong would win—he’d take the gold medal. But knowing and experiencing are two different things. Qin Mudong genuinely loved physics and genuinely cared about this competition. At such an important moment, Lu Xingjia wanted to be there. He didn’t want to see him face it alone.
But there were too many things to consider—he simply couldn’t leave.
Not to mention that he was still a high school student—there’s no way the school would approve it, and He Xi definitely wouldn’t agree either. What’s more, Lu Xingjia had a nagging feeling that He Xi was already starting to suspect something.
Lu Xingjia thought in frustration, Why does school still have to go on?
Even though there was a sports meet in the next few days, it had nothing to do with the senior year students, so he absolutely couldn’t get away.
All he could do was give Qin Mudong another hug and whisper in his ear, “Good luck.”
Just like that, he sent Qin Mudong off with regret, dragging his feet as he headed upstairs. Suddenly, he overheard a conversation between two girls behind him.
Their voices were hushed and deliberately low, but the words still reached Lu Xingjia’s ears loud and clear.
“Oh right, don’t forget—just say I’m staying at your place!”
“You’re seriously going to that singer’s concert?”
“Of course! It’s the whole weekend! That’s plenty of time for a round trip!”
“But based on the ticket times, you won’t even make it for the full concert!”
“So what? Even if I only hear one minute, one second—just seeing my idol in person makes it worth it!”
…
Right—how could he have forgotten? There’s still the weekend!
A lightbulb went off in Lu Xingjia’s head. He hurriedly found a bathroom to hide in and used his newly activated 3G phone to check ticket info.
Friday night: Xingjiang to Ningtong.
After a long loading time, the white background and blue font finally appeared.
Got it!
Lu Xingjia clutched his phone and let out a sigh of relief.
Perfect—there were still tickets.
The experimental competition lasted eight days in total: two days for registration, day three for the theoretical test, day four for the experiment, days five and six for free activities and grading, and days seven and eight for meetings and awards.
Saturday just happened to be the theoretical exam. If he traveled on Saturday, he’d arrive right after the afternoon exam—not distracting Qin Mudong, but giving him a surprise.
Author’s Note:
Jia Jia traveling across provinces to see his man.