Last Love chapter 21

When Xu Jiale opened the door and came back, he keenly detected the smell of smoke. Initially, he couldn’t find Wen Ke. After scanning the living room twice, he finally spotted him curled up in a small corner on the floor beside the sofa.

Wen Ke was wearing only one slipper; the other had been kicked aside. His entire head was buried between his knees.

In the glass ashtray near his slender and pale foot, cigarette butts were pressed tightly, and an empty beer can lay crookedly on the floor, portraying a desolate scene.

Xu Jiale was momentarily shocked. He knew Wen Ke to be remarkably resilient, able to maintain a calm and composed demeanor even in the face of significant blows like divorce. This was the first time he had seen Wen Ke in such a self-destructive state.

“Hey…”

Xu Jiale walked over, crouched down, and discovered that Wen Ke tightly clutched two sheets of paper in his hands. Without examining them closely, he patted Wen Ke’s shoulder. After a brief pause, he said, “I saw Han Jiangque in the elevator just now. He left without saying anything when he saw me return.”

Wen Ke lifted his head from between his knees. A few strands of hair stood on end, and his eyes seemed lifeless. “He was still standing outside before you came in?”

Without waiting for an answer, Wen Ke fumbled for a cigarette.

“Damn it, Wen Ke, you’re going to smoke all my cigarettes—If you want to smoke, buy your own. Don’t take advantage of an unemployed person like me.”

Xu Jiale exaggeratedly complained. Seeing that Wen Ke didn’t react to his joke, he sighed and sat down next to him. “Should I say—I actually knew you liked Han Jiangque. I’ve known since high school.”

“I know that you know.”

Wen Ke’s voice was very soft.

After he got together with Zhuo Yuan in high school, only Xu Jiale had asked him with indifference, “Have you really thought it through?”

Xu Jiale rarely spoke much and seemed uninterested in other people’s emotional gossip, but his insight was astoundingly sharp.

Seeing their current state, he straightforwardly asked, “Did you not come to an agreement today?”

He asked directly, “Is it because you don’t want to? When I saw Han Jiangque outside just now, he looked lost, like someone experiencing their first heartbreak at eighteen. But you shouldn’t completely dislike him now, right?”

Wen Ke was at a loss. Perhaps the question was too direct, and he remained silent for a long time before hesitantly saying, “I did like Han Jiangque ten years ago. You, you know that.”

“But I’m asking about now.”

“Now it’s been ten years, and I feel… I, I and Han Jiangque shouldn’t cling to the past. And…”

“Wen Ke, I didn’t ask whether you should or shouldn’t.”

Xu Jiale once again bluntly interrupted him.

Wen Ke’s lips trembled, and he struggled to continue, “And at this point in time, I just divorced Zhuo Yuan. Being with Han Jiangque right now feels… I, I can’t do it. He said, even if there’s pressure, even if we’re not really together, just spending the heat cycle with him as his client is fine. But I, I…”

Xu Jiale pushed his glasses and said, “Wen Ke, why do you think this time is so special? After a divorce, you should be more free, right? He hasn’t even pressured you.”

“Because…”

Wen Ke found himself unable to resist following Xu Jiale’s line of thought. After thinking for a while, he looked increasingly disheartened. “Because, I’m not as outstanding as I was ten years ago. I’m a failure, very mediocre… The Wen Ke he liked back then is not the me now.”

As he spoke, he buried his face back between his knees. After a very long time, he finally almost whispered the words that had been haunting him, “I’m not worthy of him anymore.”

“Fuck.”

After a while, he suddenly cursed.

He was both sad and irritable, and he slammed his fist heavily on the sofa. Despite raising his voice, his expression conveyed a sense of powerlessness as he repeated, “fuck.”

Xu Jiale was somewhat surprised, a hint of pity flashing in his eyes.

Since they met, Wen Ke had always been a good student. Xu Jiale had never heard Wen Ke curse anyone before. The sudden burst of profanity seemed like a breakdown, a manifestation of indignant anger.

“Wen Ke, you’re not devalued, never will be.”

He said earnestly.

Wen Ke, like a drowning person grabbing onto a straw, nodded silently.

Of course, he knew people couldn’t be devalued.

People weren’t objects or currency.

He shouldn’t be thinking this way.

Yet, a surge of anger and heartache rose from the depths of his heart—

For himself.

He had never been an ignorant and weak Omega. He was intelligent, hardworking, educated, and he once believed he could create wealth and value in his own life.

However, the words he spoke now had unknowingly taken root in certain corners of his heart filled with filth.

In the repeated and insistent demands of the Zhuo family regarding reproduction, in the values repeatedly emphasized and instilled by the outside world.

He had been domesticated.

Even he himself began to feel that his value lay in the gland behind his neck, in being a healthy, fertile Omega, in surrendering his most complete self to an Alpha.

Xu Jiale suddenly reached out and pressed his shoulder. Usually lazy and laid-back, his expression was now serious. “Wen Ke, your problem is that you always use your brain to think about every situation. Using your brain is a good thing; it keeps you clear-headed. But the answers to some things in life flow from the heart, and it depends on whether you are willing to face them. Don’t let others tell you what your value is. Your confusion now is because you haven’t seen what you truly desire in your heart, and you’ve neglected your own wishes. But all of this can be changed, it’s not difficult at all, as long as you’re honest.”

“What I asked was a very simple question: Do you still like Han Jiangque? Do you want to be with him? So, Wen Ke, do you really have no answer in your heart?”

“I…” Wen Ke heard his own nervous heartbeat, beating rapidly as if it wanted to burst out of his chest—

The golden light of the evening sun spilled onto the floor of the new home.

…

In the evening, the northern city area had not yet become bustling. White-collar workers moved through it; some stayed for nightlife, while others hurriedly drove home.

The B1 level below LM Club was a huge open space, illuminated by a central incandescent light shining on a tall square boxing ring.

Usually, small boxing matches would be held on weekends, featuring Western and Thai boxing. During weekdays, the space was sometimes rented out for people interested in learning boxing, making it a relatively niche and high-consumption venue in B City.

At this time, the venue should have been closed, but within the four bright red ropes, a tall figure was tirelessly pounding a sandbag in the center.

The sounds of “bang, bang, bang, bang” echoed continuously. Han Jiangque’s upper body was bare, and he wore fiery red boxing shorts on his lower half. Beads of sweat rolled down his taut back, making him even more striking under the incandescent light.

After who knows how long, the mechanical punching finally stopped. Han Jiangque stood still in a daze, as if contemplating something.

After a while, he tossed the boxing gloves aside and lay on his back in the center of the boxing ring, closing his eyes.

Lying like this, he felt as if he had returned to high school, lying together with Wen Ke on the red plastic track. The gentle breeze of summer fluttered by, and time passed in the blink of an eye.

When he opened his eyes again, he happened to see Fu Xiaoyu, dressed in a pink casual shirt, just jumping onto the boxing ring. He then effortlessly lay down next to him. The scent of magnolia on his body also wafted into his nose.

“Heard from the receptionist that you were boxing alone downstairs—What’s wrong? Are you in a bad mood?”

Fu Xiaoyu turned to look at Han Jiangque, with round and slightly wide hazel eyes, giving off a cat-like, alluring feeling.

He was an Omega with A-level high-level pheromones, meaning that for Alphas, his unmarked self was almost irresistibly attractive.

When Han Jiangque first went to the United States for college, their two schools were only a street apart.

Fu Xiaoyu often ran over to watch him play basketball. At that time, Han Jiangque always felt that Fu Xiaoyu’s scent was too strong, making him nauseous.

Later, Fu Xiaoyu told him that his scent was the floral scent of magnolia, and he even showed Han Jiangque a picture of them—

Magnolia did indeed resemble Fuxiaoyu.

Often described as sweet, citrusy, and lemony with a touch of vanilla, known for being fresh, captivating, and slightly creamy and the flower language was: beautiful, desire.

“I’m okay.”

Han Jiangque said, “Btw, I handed the car keys to your assistant.”

“You’re very cautious.”

Fu Xiaoyu smiled, “Do you want Zhuo Yuan to check my car?”

“If he checks your car, at most, he’ll find out about LM. He won’t dig any further, he’ll just think you’re my boss—Zhuo’s family is smart, but Zhuo Yuan might not be.”

Han Jiangque’s eyes darkened, saying, “Zhuo Yuan has always thought I’m a fool.”

“Aren’t you?”

Fu Xiaoyu blinked, “So, what did Wen Ke say to you today…?”

“He,” Han Jiangque fell silent for a moment, turned his head away, and said in a hoarse voice, “He doesn’t want me.”

Han Jiangque’s voice sounded a bit low.

He wouldn’t lie to Fu Xiaoyu.

From college to graduation, Fu Xiaoyu has always been his best partner and friend.

After a while, Han Jiangque sat up. He continued as if answering himself, “It doesn’t matter; I can wait.”

“Han Jiangque,” Fu Xiaoyu also sat up, looking at his eyes, paused, and then asked casually, “What’s so good about Wen Ke? Looks? I’ve seen photos. Although he’s handsome, he doesn’t seem to be that good-looking. Or is it because of his exceptionally good personality? Enough to make you remember for ten years?”

“Yeah,” Han Jiangque answered casually, and it was unclear what he meant by “yeah.” After a while, he said slowly, “Wen Ke is very smart.”

Fu Xiaoyu nodded. Just when he thought this was the answer—

Han Jiangque continued, “But sometimes he is also stupid.”

Looking at Han Jiangque’s expression, Fu Xiaoyu’s narrow and black eyes seemed to be looking at him but seemed to see something more beautiful through him.

“In high school, I really hated Wen Ke. He was the good student assigned by the teacher to follow me around, babbling nonsense every day, more annoying than Tang Seng, always telling him to get lost. Once, I was blocked in a small alley by several hooligans asking for money. I said I had no money—anyway, fighting, I’ve never been afraid of it. I rushed up.”

“There were a lot of them, and I was short at that time, half a head shorter than Wen Ke. Later, I got a bit desperate because there were too many of them. I took out a small knife from my pocket, ready to fight to the death. That’s when Wen Ke suddenly appeared from somewhere and tackled me down into the muddy ground. He shielded me while they surrounded us, punching and kicking for five minutes until his arms were broken—”

“I was about to win, but he hugged me tightly, really embarrassing. He couldn’t fight, and who asked him to protect me anyway.”

Although Han Jiangque’s tone was impolite, his eyelashes trembled slightly with a smile when he lowered his eyes.

This expression was as shy as that of a somewhat naive teenager.

“And then…?” Fu Xiaoyu asked, delving into Han Jiangque’s past, something he had never mentioned to him before.

“After that, he went to the hospital for treatment, but he didn’t say it was because of my fight; he just said he was beaten up by some delinquents. The school didn’t investigate further. At that time, I scolded him for being a hindrance and threatened to cut those bastards with my knife. Wen Ke, lying in bed, pitifully told me that it was because he saw my knife that he rushed over. If I had stabbed someone severely, I might have been arrested—unable to go to school and be friends with him.”

“Damn it. So later, I drew a painting and gave it to him in the hospital, as an apology or thanks— it was a giraffe. I intentionally drew it ugly because I thought… It looked a lot like him.”

“Fu Xiaoyu,” Han Jiangque looked up, his eyes seemed to still be immersed in the memories and glowed with a faint light, “Only Wen Ke has ever protected me like that.”

Fu Xiaoyu watched Han Jiangque, and for a moment, he didn’t say anything. 

Throughout the entire story, even though Han Jiangque hadn’t mentioned the word ‘love,’ it was probably still love.

Absurd and a bit ridiculous.

Alphas were born powerful and aggressive, while Omegas were inherently gentle, but the relationship between Han Jiangque and Wen Ke seemed inverted.

Han Jiangque didn’t say anything more.

Many stories, even if told, would still leave the current emotions permanently sealed in the heart.

Because no one would understand, even if they secretly reminisced, it would feel pathological.

That year, when Wen Ke pressed him down on the muddy street, taking those heavy punches for him, a drop of blood stained his face—

Wen Ke’s blood.

He suddenly froze, as if countless electric currents converged on him for an instant, an almost climax-like vague palpitation.

After that incident, he never rejected Wen Ke’s chatter and following.

The powerful Alpha, protected, realized that being protected was a sweet feeling.

From then on, he, against his nature, fell in love with his protector.

“Han Jiangque… It’s my birthday today.”

Fu Xiaoyu suddenly stood up. He was tall and slender among Omegas, wearing a well-tailored shirt and trousers, showcasing his elegance.

He continued, “I received your gift, but that’s not enough. Same old rule, you have to accompany me to the pub for a while. It’s also a way for you to relax. How about it?”

“Sure.”

Han Jiangque understood Fu Xiaoyu’s habits. He took a towel from the ropes and jumped off the boxing ring, saying, “I’ll take a shower, see you at Zeus later.”

Zeus was the pub next to the LM Club, where he occasionally went with Fu Xiaoyu for a drink and chat.

Just as Han Jiangque was about to reach the elevator, Fu Xiaoyu suddenly whispered behind him, “Han Jiangque, in life, you don’t necessarily have to love only one person.”

Maybe because the voice was too soft, Han Jiangque turned his head, showing a questioning expression. “What did you say?”

“Nothing.” Fu Xiaoyu immediately revealed a bright smile. “See you later.”

…

Wen Ke stared at the golden spot on the floor.

“I…” he hesitated.

At that moment, the small living room of the new home seemed to turn into a battlefield with a thousand troops and horses.

Facing his true desires, it turned out to be such a difficult thing.

Xu Jiale quietly stared at him, neither urging nor anxious.

Finally—

“I want to.”

Wen Ke closed his eyes and said softly.

He wanted to be with Han Jiangque.

After uttering those two words, all the emotions seemed to burst like a dam breaking—

He trembled and asked, “Should I, should I tell him now, or is it better to wait a little longer?”

“Wait for what?” Xu Jiale asked.

“I don’t know.”

Wen Ke’s mind was in chaos. He felt like he was floating upward, feeling dangerous and anxious. “Just wait, wait until I’m in a better situation, settled down, or find a job… I…”

“Wait for another ten years? Anyway, it’s up to you.”

Xu Jiale shrugged, and at this moment, he returned to his lazy appearance. “At 28, you’re not young, but at 38, you’re not old. You can date whenever you want; there’s still a risk of a disastrous failure anyway. Just don’t lie to yourself again.”

After saying this, he took the drawing paper from Wen Ke’s hand, and couldn’t help squinting at it. “It’s so ugly, this giraffe. Did Han Jiangque draw it?”

“Yes.” Wen Ke’s face turned a bit red, and he quickly took it back.

Xu Jiale didn’t snatch it back. After stretching lazily, he stood up. Just before leaving, he suddenly said with a meaningful tone, “But I think if you wait a little longer, you definitely won’t be the one most heartbroken.”

“Why?”

“Some psychological counseling factions start with asking people to draw trees. In my opinion, not only trees can reveal problems, all recurring elements in paintings are actually projections of a person’s psyche.”

“Take a closer look. Both giraffes are almost as tall as the sky. The giraffe is you—”

Xu Jiale bent down, pointed at the drawing with his finger, and said, “Wen Ke, Han Jiangque doesn’t just love you.”

“He idolizes you.”

Wen Ke was suddenly stunned.

“And the time of these two drawings should be different, but he is forever a five or six-year-old boy in them. This indicates that a part of his inner self has never grown up.”

“Sometimes he hugs your neck, sometimes he hides from the rain under your protection—why is it always this composition? What do you think?”

“He, he relies on me…”

Wen Ke trembled, holding onto the armrest of the sofa as he stood up. He held the drawing in his hand, as if holding a map to Han Jiangque’s inner world, and murmured repeatedly, “He needs me… Han Jiangque needs me to protect him, needs me to love him.”

When he said this, he suddenly raised his head. “Xu Jiale, I’m going to find him.”

In his eyes, tears were shimmering.

A moment of courage, a moment of decision.

In the eyes of others, how insignificant this hesitation and decision might be, but in his heart, it was earth-shattering and overwhelming.

Love is like a rope hanging in the air.

One end is timidity, the other end is courage.

Only by groping and hesitating on this rope can one truly experience the fascinating aspect of love.

The long-necked giraffe that stood in the wilderness for a long time finally decided to rush hurriedly tonight—

Just because the beloved boy really needed him.