Last Love chapter 103
That entire night, Wen Ke couldn’t sleep.
With his growing belly, lying flat became uncomfortable, so he usually nestled sideways in Han Jiangque’s arms. In the middle of the night, when his legs cramped, he would bite Han Jiangque’s ear half-asleep, murmuring in pain. Even when the Alpha was drowsy with half-closed eyes, he could accurately feel his belly and patiently massage it under the covers.
On so many nights, they were like two small animals cuddling tightly together in the winter, skin against skin, toes touching toes. One night, Wen Ke remembered waking up in the middle of the night unable to sleep and couldn’t resist kissing Han Jiangque’s eyebrows and eyes several times.
Later, he guessed that Han Jiangque was awake, but neither of them exposed it. One person secretly kissed, and the other person’s eyelashes trembled as if pretending to sleep.
Wen Ke has always believed that their love was unimaginable for anyone.
The feeling of souls entwined, the silent longing that spanned ten years of life.
They had only been reunited for less than a year, and they were already passionately in love, ready to spend their lives together. But unexpectedly, after half a year of love, when he asked, “Do you hate me?” Han Jiangque looked at him in pain. His pitch-black eyes clearly told him the answer, but he couldn’t bring himself to speak that word.
Han Jiangque really hated him.
Wen Ke didn’t know if the ache and pain in his chest were because he finally dimly realized that he was also hated, or if it was because of Han Jiangque, who loved so painfully.
When he loved him, would he also hate him? So, like loving a knife, would he bleed with each embrace?
When he kissed him, made love, left hickeys all over him, would he hate him too?
Would he see Zhuo Yuan through his face? Would he consider him a betrayer?
Would it hurt?
It turns out that the most heart-wrenching answers in the world are not the ones you don’t know.
They were the ones you had once thought you could escape.
Wen Ke stared blankly out of the window, not pulling the curtains, so he could keep staring at the night in City B. It slowly turned from pitch black to a faint white on the horizon.
Dull and gloomy, like a dim bad mood, casting through the cracks in the sky onto the mortal world.
Memories surged towards him like a tide. Wen Ke closed his eyes, and he continued to fall into a bottomless trench.
Those sweet and playful moments with Han Jiangque, the gentle whispers when touching each other, seemed like a long and distant ship whistle from the harbor.
As if a ship had left in the early morning.
…
At seven fifteen, Wen Ke finally struggled to get out of bed.
Today was a packed day, with a routine checkup in the morning, a meeting on the Last Love app in the afternoon, and an evening discussion with Wang Jinglin about the progress of the first version of the app.
He was already fifteen minutes late, which was quite rare.
Despite being pregnant, he still tried to get up at the same time every day, took a fixed afternoon nap, and even managed to find time for prenatal yoga at night. It could be said that he maintained a rare and energetic state.
But today, when he saw his own face in the bathroom mirror, he couldn’t help but be stunned for a moment. He looked pale, exhausted, and lethargic, holding his toothbrush listlessly.
Rather than physical exhaustion, he seemed to have lost the vitality he had before overnight.
Standing blankly in front of the mirror, a sudden thought flashed through his mind —
Without Han Jiangque, he seemed not to know what continued struggle and effort meant.
However, the prenatal checkup couldn’t be delayed. Wen Ke reluctantly supported his tired body, changed into a thick down jacket, and went downstairs.
He had already arranged for Xu Jiale to help him get to the hospital, but this was somewhat sudden, so Xu Jiale had just driven his Tesla over. Without entering the underground parking lot, he parked outside.
When he saw Wen Ke, he got out of the car and walked over.
Wen Ke’s waist was a bit sore. He took a few steps forward with his hand supporting himself. Suddenly, under the hazy daylight, he saw a familiar figure sitting slightly curled up on the stone steps by the flower bed.
“Han Jiangque…”
Wen Ke paused for a moment but then called out.
The tall Alpha turned his head and immediately stood up when he saw it was Wen Ke.
He seemed a bit disheveled, with a black wool coat covered in many grass and snow particles, his face frozen pale, but his eyes were bloodshot.
“Han Jiangque, did you sit here all night?”
Wen Ke was a bit anxious. “Are you cold? Are you sick? Let me check—”
“I…”
Han Jiangque wanted to speak but suddenly saw Xu Jiale walking over from the other side. His expression immediately turned cold.
He stepped back, refusing to let Wen Ke touch him.
“The prenatal check-up is in Room 13 of Building B. The doctor’s surname is Xiao, and it’s booked. No need to queue.”
Han Jiangque didn’t look at Wen Ke and said in a cold and firm tone to Xu Jiale.
“Don’t worry.” Xu Jiale nodded awkwardly.
Wen Ke suddenly thought, maybe Han Jiangque had been sitting here all night because he still remembered that he had to accompany him for the prenatal check-up.
Han Jiangque adjusted his coat collar, and there was a trace of indiscernible fatigue in his expression. Still, he stubbornly held on to that determination. “I thought about it all night. Wen Ke… maybe we both need to calm down, separate for a while. It might be better.”
His voice was hoarse, and as he spoke, the sentences that were supposed to become firmer were getting smaller.
He couldn’t help but look at Wen Ke’s face—
Wen Ke’s haggard look, the gentle brown eyes, the eyelashes in the cold morning breeze seemed to have a furry frost.
If he just looked a little longer, the reluctance in his heart would increase.
He didn’t speak as strongly as he had thought. Sitting here all night, in fact, all thoughts in his mind lacked integrity.
He didn’t want to back down, but he also didn’t want to break up with Wen Ke.
Because he was afraid Wen Ke would say those two words first, he fiercely threw out this sentence—
We’re just taking a break, not breaking up. Definitely not breaking up.
“…Okay.”
Wen Ke lowered his head, revealing his long, slender neck. “Then, let’s both think about it again.”
He hadn’t worn a scarf. Would he feel very cold?
Han Jiangque wondered.
“Call me for the next check-up.”
Han Jiangque couldn’t help but say again, “If you’re uncomfortable, call me anytime, even if you can’t sleep, call me.”
“Okay.”
Wen Ke responded again, his eyes a bit sore.
This was the first time Han Jiangque had actively requested separation. Wen Ke understood Han Jiangque’s meaning; this time, he was determined to stick to his approach, even if it meant a cold war with him.
“Han Jiangque,” Wen Ke raised his eyes, “don’t drive back.”
When Han Jiangque heard this, the stubborn and calm expression he had just had instantly faltered. He stuttered for a moment before asking somewhat sadly, “Wen Ke, are you… not letting me drive the Land Rover?”
“Look at your eyes, they’re all bloodshot. Don’t drive; I’ll worry. Measure your temperature when you get back. If you have a fever, let me know. Even as an Alpha, you can get sick in this cold weather, you know?” Wen Ke sniffed lightly, his voice soft.
…
As Xu Jiale drove, Wen Ke stared blankly out the car window.
Xu Jiale sighed and said softly, “Wen Ke, you know, you can talk to me.”
“I’m really confused, Xu Jiale.”
Wen Ke exhaled against the car window, watching the frost gradually accumulate, fogging up the window. He murmured, “After leaving Zhuo Yuan, I originally just wanted… to make the app, but the surprise of being with Han Jiangque was something I never expected. So, for our future, I thought I had to work even harder to deserve being with him, to deserve this happiness. Love, work, pregnancy, even marriage—I thought it would be like solving equations in my childhood, eliminating denominators, removing parentheses, rearranging terms, and then solving it. Back then, I felt every problem was straightforward, but now, it’s so difficult.
“Sometimes, I feel like I can see happiness at the end of the road, a straight path. I want to grab Han Jiangque’s hand and run over there… but he’s getting unhappier, and the more I want to hold onto him, the more I feel our hearts are separating. Han Jiangque especially hates Zhuo Yuan, hates him to the point of gritting his teeth, wanting to destroy the entire Zhuo family. But hatred is too painful and tortuous. I don’t want to hate. I just want to use my strength to move forward.”
“It’s like watching him adding numbers to one side of the equation, and it’s unsolvable. Xu Jiale, I’m really scared. I’m afraid I can’t solve this problem of life.”
“Wen Ke, logically speaking, I can understand you.”
Xu Jiale said calmly, “Since I’ve known you, you’ve been a good student. I’m not a good student, but I’m very clear about the thinking of a good student—solving problems has a method, just like living has a method. The straight line between two points is the shortest; you should take the straight path. It’s not correct to waste time hating someone not worth it, so don’t hate. You’ve always been clear and correct. Is being correct wrong?”
“I don’t know, Xu Jiale. I really don’t know.”
Wen Ke closed his eyes in agony, “I wasted ten years, unlucky for ten years. I’m especially afraid, afraid that I wasted time on a fork in the road, and happiness slipped away through my fingers.”
“I know, Wen Ke, I know you want to move toward the light.”
Xu Jiale opened the car window a crack, took a deep breath of the cold air, remained silent for a long time, and then said in a deep voice, “You think people can only live by relying on the light, but that’s not true. People actually need shadows to survive.
“The scars of those ten years are the shadows of both of you, not just Han Jiangque’s. Wen Ke, if you can’t see the shadow, it might mean you’ve chosen to stand in the darkness.”
“So when you’re pulling Han Jiangque to run towards the sun, have you ever thought about looking back at your shadows?”