Hearing You Say Love chapter 34

 I Guess I’m Not That Straight

When he wrote this sentence, Su Ming was actually quite nervous.

Although he felt that Zou Beiyuan definitely had feelings for him too, “he likes me too” wasn’t that one of life’s three big illusions?

What if it was just an illusion?

What if Zou Beiyuan really was straight?

Su Ming quietly observed Zou Beiyuan’s reaction, and he noticed Zou Beiyuan slowly turning red, blushing all the way to his ears.

The usually shy big guy seemed reluctant to meet Su Ming’s eyes, looking down as he drank his soup, not saying a word.

Su Ming was a bit uncertain.

He wrote on the paper: If you mind, we can go back to being strangers.

Pushing the notebook towards Zou Beiyuan, who immediately replied, “I don’t mind!”

He looked at Su Ming, looking a bit anxious, stuttering as if he just remembered his many homophobic remarks not long ago and tried to make up for it: “Um… whether liking the same sex or the opposite sex, it’s everyone’s freedom and should be respected and understood.”

Su Ming asked him, “Don’t you find it disgusting?”

“Not at all,” Zou Beiyuan said seriously.

…..

The next day, Zou Beiyuan woke up to a message from Su Ming sent half an hour earlier.

Su Ming: [I’m on my way, I’ll be back in two days.]

Zou Beiyuan immediately replied: [What time will you arrive the day after tomorrow? I’ll pick you up at the airport.]

Only after sending it did he realize Su Ming was probably still on the plane, so he checked the flight status—departed from Rong City to Dunhuang at a little past seven, arriving at nine fifty-five.

He began checking his phone every fifteen minutes, feeling like time was dragging on.

During training, he couldn’t resist checking, seeming distracted.

Joyce couldn’t take it anymore and took away his phone, demanding he focus.

But he couldn’t concentrate.

Last night, Su Ming came out to him.

Although he had already vaguely guessed the answer in his heart, he never expected Su Ming to be so straightforward with him.

So much so that Zou Beiyuan was a bit at a loss and had said a lot of silly things.

When they discussed the marginalization of sexual minority groups in social interactions, Zou Beiyuan solemnly told Su Ming, “Although I’m straight, I absolutely won’t discriminate against gays. Even if you are one, I’m still very willing to continue being friends with you.”

Su Ming thanked him and told him he needed to get up early the next day, so he should go home quickly.

They politely said goodnight at Su Ming’s doorstep, and then Su Ming slammed the door shut, louder than usual.

Clearly, Su Ming was angry, but Zou Beiyuan didn’t know why.

Zou Beiyuan felt like he might have said something wrong.

Before bed last night, he had sent a message to Su Ming: [What time are you leaving tomorrow? When will you be back?]

After sending it, he saw the message “Typing…” at the top of the chat box for a few seconds, then nothing.

He didn’t sleep well all night, and in the morning Su Ming replied, which initially relieved him.

However, it had been quite a while since nine fifty-five, and Su Ming still hadn’t responded.

Still by afternoon, Su Ming still hadn’t replied.

Zou Beiyuan felt restless all day, having dinner with Xu Jiadi and the others in the evening, telling them about what happened.

He thought Xu Jiadi, who had a lot of emotional experience, would know what to do.

But Xu Jiadi seemed even dumber than him, not only failing to analyze why Su Ming was angry, but also joining Jiang Zufan and Yu Dian in urging him to quickly find a girlfriend, advising him all night.

Was finding a girlfriend the issue now?

Now that Su Ming was ignoring him, wasn’t that a more serious problem than not having a girlfriend?

These clueless straight guys were simply unreliable. In the end, Zou Beiyuan turned to Chen Muchao for help.

….

At eight thirty in the evening, Chen Muchao, Su Ming and several producers were meeting in a hotel room when Chen Muchao received a message from Zou Beiyuan.

Zou Beiyuan: [Chen Ge, what are you guys doing?]

Chen Muchao glanced over and handed the phone to Su Ming.

Su Ming replied in Chen Muchao’s chat: [In a meeting, what’s up?]

Zou Beiyuan: [What is Su Ming doing?]

[He’s in a meeting too.]

Zou Beiyuan: [Is he in a good mood?]

Su Ming widened his eyes, what does he mean? Is he worried?

He stared for a while, earnestly typing: [Seems like he’s not too good, what’s wrong?]”

Zou Beiyuan: [I’ll wait until you’re done with the meeting, I’ll call you.]

Using Chen Muchao’s typing style, Su Ming replied: “[You can just text me, this meeting of ours will take a long time.]”

After a while, Zou Beiyuan said: [Last night Su Ming came out to me, Chen Ge, you know his sexual orientation right?]

Su Ming squeezed Chen Muchao’s phone: [Hmm, I know.]

Zou Beiyuan: “[I told him I would understand and respect his sexual orientation, but he seems upset.]”

Su Ming deliberately asked, “[How did you say it?]”

Zou Beiyuan repeated what he had said to him last night.

Actually, by the time Zou Beiyuan came to inquire about his mood, Su Ming was no longer angry at all.

After all, how many people in the world would care so much about his feelings?

He couldn’t help but soften his heart and then used Chen Muchao’s WeChat to say to this lovely straight guy: “[You’re right, there’s no problem.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[Then why is he upset?]”

Su Ming typed: “[He’s not upset.] After sending it, he felt it was a bit contradictory since he had previously said he was not in a good mood, as if he was brushing Zou Beiyuan off. So, he retyped: “[He’s not upset because of you.]”

This sentence wasn’t good either; it was ambiguous.

After thinking for a while, Su Ming mischievously typed: “[It might be because he told you his secret, but you didn’t tell him yours.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[My secret? But I don’t have any secrets from Su Ming?]”

Su Ming: “[Really?]”

Then why did you ask Chen Muchao about Su Ming’s mood?

Zou Beiyuan, do you like Su Ming?

These two sentences were just thoughts in his mind.

Su Ming left it at that; after sending that message, he returned the phone to Chen Muchao.

That night, after taking a shower and lying on his bed, Su Ming replied to Zou Beiyuan’s morning message: “[I’ll be back the day after tomorrow at three thirty in the afternoon. No need to pick me up; I’ll get back with Chen Muchao.]”

He also sent a photo of Crescent Spring at dusk, saying: “[It’s so beautiful here.]”

Zou Beiyuan almost replied instantly: “[It really is beautiful.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[Were you busy today? Tired?]”

Su Ming: “[Not really.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[Are you at the hotel?]”

Su Ming: “[Yeah.]”

Then he took a photo of his hotel room and sent it to Zou Beiyuan.

The room wasn’t big, and it wasn’t as luxurious as the hotels they had stayed in together before.

The lighting in the room was dim, creating an atmosphere for sleep.

As Zou Beiyuan looked at the photo, he thought of how Su Ming wasn’t used to hotel bathrobes and would always bring his own pajamas when traveling. Zou Beiyuan had seen that comfortable cotton pajama set many times; it seemed like it would be great to hug.

Getting sidetracked again, Zou Beiyuan pulled his thoughts back and suddenly paused.

If he had any secrets he was hiding from Su Ming, this should count as one—he couldn’t help but fantasize about Su Ming constantly.

But could he say that?

Telling the person involved, “I have a secret to tell you; I spend all day fantasizing about doing this and that with you.”

Wouldn’t that be a bit inappropriate?

Su Ming sent another message: “[I’m going to sleep now.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[Are you alone?]”

Su Ming: “[Yeah, I can’t sleep in the same room with others.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[Didn’t you sleep in the same room with me before?]”

Su Ming took a while to reply: “[You’re different.]”

Zou Beiyuan felt as if his heart had been scratched by a little cat’s paw and almost couldn’t resist confessing his secret to Su Ming.

Zou Beiyuan: “[What’s different about me?]”

Su Ming didn’t truthfully answer that question.

He typed another reason: “[The room was arranged by Chen Muchao; he knows my sexual orientation, so he didn’t arrange for other male colleagues to share a room with me.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[Hmm.]”

That arrangement was appropriate; Chen Ge was a good guy.

Su Ming: “[Now that you know my orientation, if we ever have to share a room again, let’s take separate rooms to avoid making you uncomfortable.]”

Zou Beiyuan: “[I wouldn’t be uncomfortable.]”

Su Ming: “[But aren’t you straight?]”

Zou Beiyuan replied to Su Ming with Su Ming’s own words: “[You’re different.]”

Su Ming also asked the same question: “[What’s different about me?]”

Zou Beiyuan didn’t avoid it and honestly said: “[I said I wouldn’t discriminate against you.]”

Su Ming: …

Su Ming: “[Thank you for not discriminating against me, Mr. Straight Guy.]”

After sending that, he angrily tossed his phone onto the pillow, closed his eyes, and prepared to sleep.

The phone vibrated again, but he ignored it.

Five minutes later, he helplessly opened his eyes, unlocked his phone, and checked what this annoying straight guy had sent him.

If he talks about discrimination again, I’m going to block him!

Su Ming thought this as he saw Zou Beiyuan’s last message:

“[Actually, I’ve recently discovered that I might not be that straight after all.]”

Su Ming was taken aback, holding his phone as he read that line three times, even dropping it on his nose once because he didn’t hold it steadily.

At that moment, he was completely wide awake. His heart raced, and the corners of his mouth couldn’t help but lift. He rolled onto his side in bed and texted Zou Beiyuan: “[Why did you come to that realization?]”

But Zou Beiyuan cleverly avoided the question, only responding with: “[Good night.]”

Su Ming: ???

He felt like he could just bite Zou Beiyuan; he was even better at teasing the plot than he was!

Maybe I should give you the pen name “Shu Yu Ming Jin” so you can tell stories instead.

So annoying.

Su Ming tossed his phone a little farther away, rolled around under the covers, closed his eyes, but found he couldn’t sleep at all.

His heart was stirred by that sentence.

Now that Little Wolf has admitted he might not be that straight, if they share a room next time, could something happen?