Don’t Ignite It chapter 49

Happy Breakup

After his lecture, Xu Zhan received a call from Xia Yu.

Xia Yu asked if he had time to meet up.

“Is something wrong?” Xu Zhan glanced at his watch and thought for a moment. “I should be free. I don’t have any classes later.”

“That’s good,” Xia Yu’s voice came through amidst the background noise, as if he were driving. “It’s nothing important, just something I want to discuss with you.”

“Can’t you talk about it over the phone?” Xu Zhan asked.

Xia Yu gripped the steering wheel and looked ahead. “Not really. I’d prefer to talk to you in person.”

Xu Zhan found it a bit strange, but he didn’t press further. “Alright,” he checked his schedule, “let’s meet in the afternoon then. I’ll finish up at school earlier.”

That afternoon, Xu Zhan left the school and headed to where Xia Yu had asked to meet. On his way, he received a call from Ruan Sen.

Two days ago, Ruan Sen had suddenly mentioned that he had some business to attend to and would be away for a few days. Xu Zhan had inquired about it, but Ruan Sen had been reluctant to share the details, so he didn’t push further.

“Are you back at home now? Weren’t you going to meet friends?” he asked softly.

“Well, initially, but my family detained me just as I was about to leave, asking me to stay for a couple of days,” Ruan Sen’s voice sounded lazy, and he complained, “My dad is so annoying, like an autocratic parent. He acts like an emperor, issuing commands left and right, saying I’m not ambitious enough. My sister and my brother are the same, changing partners like they’re changing clothes, but they come to educate me, telling me not to be reckless. How shameless.”

Xu Zhan couldn’t help but smile. He liked it when Ruan Sen complained and acted spoiled, like a wild and spirited leopard finally showing its belly.

“Why don’t you come back earlier, then?” he suggested. He didn’t want Ruan Sen to stay at home for too long, not for the sake of monopolizing him, but because Ruan Sen’s family seemed quite distant from human emotions, which was probably why Ruan Sen had moved out to live on his own at such a young age.

Ruan Sen chuckled. “Do you miss me that much, Professor Xu?”

He asked casually, his voice a bit husky, like the tone he used after lovemaking, which stirred Xu Zhan’s heart again.

“Actually, I’ve been doing just fine on my own without you by my side,” Xu Zhan replied, “but now that you’re gone, I find it hard to get used to it.”

It sounded like he was talking to himself.

But the person on the other end of the phone fell silent.

Ruan Sen stood in the airport terminal. Not far away, blond-haired children ran around, and the air was filled with the sweet aroma of coffee.

In fact, he had already returned to China, but he hadn’t told Xu Zhan yet.

He had never made any promises to Xu Zhan.

Their relationship had always been light-hearted and casual from the beginning, initially intended for a few months of companionship without any commitment. Ruan Sen had sought a temporary respite during his travels, but Xu Zhan, with his gentle, restrained exterior that almost seemed devout, had made him feel a twinge of attachment at this moment.

“I’ll come back as soon as possible,” Ruan Sen said solemnly.

He said this quite earnestly.

Xu Zhan felt a sense of loss for a moment, and he wanted to see Ruan Sen, every minute and every second.

The two continued their conversation, which didn’t contain much substantial content, but they didn’t want to end the call. It was only when they were about to reach their destinations that Xu Zhan had to say, “I have to hang up now; I have something to do.”

Ruan Sen didn’t sound too pleased. “What’s going on? Another meeting? Your school always gets involved in things that could lead to warnings from the union.”

“It’s not about the school,” Xu Zhan said as he opened the car door, “it’s something with a friend.”

Ruan Sen asked again, “Which friend?”

Xu Zhan didn’t know how to answer.

In fact, he only needed to give a simple response, whether it was a colleague or a childhood friend, as Ruan Sen wasn’t familiar with his friends.

But holding onto his phone, Xu Zhan hesitated for a moment, unable to speak. This friend was still his legal partner.

He replied softly, “You don’t know this friend.”

Ruan Sen fell silent.

After a while, he heard the young man on the other end chuckle lightly. “Well, I guess I don’t know any of your friends.”

As if losing interest, Ruan Sen’s voice became casual again. “I’ll hang up then. Have fun.”

A beep sounded from the phone.

Xu Zhan looked at the screen with a touch of melancholy, standing still for a few more minutes before finally entering the square.

Xia Yu had arranged to meet at the music fountain in Sofia Square. It was already evening, and there were quite a few pedestrians around the fountain. It took Xu Zhan some time to locate Xia Yu.

Xia Yu was sitting on a wrought-iron bench by the street, wearing a deep blue coat with a furry collar. The fountain’s lights reflected on his face, even illuminating his eyelashes. He seemed to be bathed in a soft glow.

Xu Zhan patted Xia Yu’s shoulder as he approached and took a seat on the bench across from him.

Xia Yu looked up and instinctively smiled. “You’re here.”

“Yeah, why did you want to meet here?” Xu Zhan asked, still puzzled by Xia Yu’s intentions.

Xia Yu smiled and said, “I happened to pass by here after work today and remembered the time when we just got married. Back then, we used to take walks here frequently.”

He opened his bag, revealing a freshly bought thermos of mulled wine with fruit, not in any fancy container, just in a thermos. He also brought two small cups.

“Would you like some?” he asked.

Xu Zhan didn’t refuse. It was a cold winter’s day, and a cup of hot mulled wine would be comforting.

Xia Yu poured a cup for himself and another for Xu Zhan. He had also bought a ham sandwich, which he placed in the middle of them as a snack.

“Are we having a picnic?” Xu Zhan couldn’t help but tease.

He was still puzzled by Xia Yu’s intentions.

Xia Yu clinked his cup against Xu Zhan’s. “You can think of it as a picnic. I’m in a good mood today and wanted to celebrate something.”

Xu Zhan took a sip of the wine and asked, “What’s the occasion? Did you sign a big client today?”

Xia Yu shook his head. “That’s a secret for now.”

He then changed the subject, saying, “Do you remember that this square is where we got engaged?”

Xu Zhan didn’t immediately grasp the significance of the location.

After a moment, he suddenly realized, “Ah… back then, I picked you up from the hospital, and we came to the café nearby. I gave you the ring.”

It had been the first time he had ever proposed to someone with an engagement ring.

Although he had already proposed to Xia Yu in the hospital corridor, and their relationship wasn’t a genuine romantic partnership, Xu Zhan had still wanted to have a ceremony.

At that time, Xia Yu’s health hadn’t been great, and he had been recuperating in the hospital for a few days. After picking Xia Yu up from the hospital, Xia Yu had insisted on having ice cream, so Xu Zhan had taken him to a café. He had been a bit stingy and ordered only a single scoop of vanilla ice cream.

Then, when the small scoop of vanilla ice cream arrived at their table, Xu Zhan had taken out a small red box in front of Xia Yu, opened it with a smile, and asked, “Will you marry me?”

The café had quite a few customers at the time, and there was even a jazz band playing on a stage.

While same-sex marriage had been legal for several years, it still wasn’t very common, especially for two people as eye-catching as them. The waitstaff had started clapping, and some of the other customers had joined in, encouraging Xia Yu to accept the proposal.

Before long, even people at other tables had noticed and joined in the cheer, shouting, “say yes! Say yes!”

Xu Zhan remembered that scene and smiled genuinely.

At the time, he hadn’t thought he would ever fall in love with someone else. Whether it was a real marriage or not, he had genuinely wanted to be with Xia Yu. That’s why, to this day, he had no regrets about proposing to Xia Yu in that café.

He had spent the last three years happily. Xia Yu was just as he had expected—lively, kind-hearted, and always devoted to his family.

He looked at Xia Yu, who was sitting next to him. Unfortunately, the engagement ring Xu Zhan had chosen back then seemed too plain when worn by someone as bright and radiant as Xia Yu. Perhaps Xia Yu should have something more dazzling, given that he was like a little sun, naturally emitting brilliance.

Xu Zhan said softly, “I should have chosen a more beautiful ring at the time.”

Later, Xia Yu’s brother had gifted them with over a dozen rings, but the one Xu Zhan had given him was the one he wore most often.

Xu Zhan couldn’t explain why, but he suddenly felt a bit bitter.

He hadn’t worn the wedding ring he had with Xia Yu for a long time, ever since he met Ruan Sen. Every time they went on a date, he would take off the wedding ring. And a month ago, he had brought back a divorce agreement, thinking of discussing it with Xia Yu.

Back then, they had agreed that no matter which one of them found a loved one someday, they would be honest with each other and end the marriage amicably. But when it came to this day, he found it difficult to say the word “divorce.” Especially now, with Xia Yu sitting beside him in the square where they had gotten engaged, bathed in the bright lights, smiling at him, he looked gentle and lovely, just like the day Xu Zhan had promised to take care of Xia Yu.

“But I think this ring is already very beautiful,” Xia Yu said.

This ring, like Xu Zhan, was simple and clean at first glance, seemingly unremarkable but with high clarity, a collectible diamond.

Xu Zhan was like that, quiet and gentle, always leaving the best for his family.

“I really like this ring, and I’ve enjoyed the three years of marriage with you. When you proposed to me in the cafe, even though it was just a formality, I was really happy,” Xia Yu’s nose felt a little sour, “I thought at the time, maybe this is the only time in my life that I’ll be proposed to.”

In fact, he hadn’t expected much from this marriage at the time.

It wasn’t that Xu Zhan was bad, but he couldn’t imagine what a loveless marriage would be like.

But the fact was that for the past three years with Xu Zhan, he had been very happy.

In this world, there was a small house with a light on that belonged to him. No matter how late it was, whenever he opened the door and went home, Xu Zhan would be waiting for him under the light.

He was pampered like the center of the universe, nurtured in the palm of Xu Zhan’s hand.

But Xu Zhan’s tolerance was different from anyone else’s. No matter what he did, Xu Zhan would stand by his side as his partner. They had made a vow before the gods to face the world together.

So the thought of parting ways with Xu Zhan was unbearable, like tearing a piece of his heart away.

But they had to separate.

Xia Yu’s eyes turned red, and the winter wind was too cold, making his eyes hurt.

He slowly took off the ring from his left ring finger, and with his palm open, he handed it to Xu Zhan.

“What do you mean by this?”

Xu Zhan was stunned.

Xia Yu tried to smile as hard as he could. He had never found it so difficult to smile.

“Xu Zhan, marrying you was the best decision I ever made in my life. These three years, even though we didn’t have romantic love, you made me very happy, truly happy.”

Xia Yu’s eyelashes trembled, and he tried hard not to blink, but tears still rolled down his face, freezing on his skin in the cold wind.

“But now, I want to earnestly request you, let’s get a divorce. I have to walk my own path in life, and I can’t really drag you along with me for the rest of my life.”

Xu Zhan was at a loss for words.

He never thought that Xia Yu would be the one to bring up divorce.

He felt a heavy weight in his chest, especially when he saw tears on Xia Yu’s face.

He asked, “Have you seen it?”

He remembered the divorce agreement he had placed in his study.

Xia Yu nodded and then shook his head.

He said, “I saw the divorce agreement in the study, but even if it wasn’t for that, I would still ask for a divorce.”

He paused for a moment and smiled with some relief. “The two of us were originally mutually supportive, partners, and confidants. You provided me with a safe haven for three years, and that’s already enough. Now that you’ve found your true love, you should marry the person you love and experience a different life.”

That young man named Ruan Sen, like a wild vine, had taken over Xu Zhan’s entire heart.

He could live with Xu Zhan, but he wasn’t so selfish as to keep Xu Zhan trapped in a marriage when he had found the one he loved.

Xu Zhan couldn’t find words to refute.

Because he had indeed been struggling and hesitating, not knowing whether to bring up the topic of divorce with Xia Yu.

But he never expected that Xia Yu would bring it up first.

He felt a lump in his chest, especially when he saw tears on Xia Yu’s face.

He asked, “What are you going to do then?”

He was asking Xia Yu, but he was also asking himself.

He had always regarded Xia Yu as his responsibility, as part of his family.

Now, halfway through, he had to separate from Xia Yu, and it felt like abandoning a beloved younger brother.

He was always afraid that Xia Yu would be bullied, afraid that after Xia Yu left him, he would encounter cruel people, and he could no longer provide a safe haven for Xia Yu.

“If you divorce me, who are you going to be with? Lu Zhao?” Xu Zhan couldn’t help but hug Xia Yu, “Will he treat you well?”

It was indeed a thought-provoking question.

Xia Yu smiled and said, “But I can’t rely on you forever. Someday, I will have to get used to a life without you. Maybe I’ll marry someone else, maybe I won’t get married, but that’s something I have to decide for myself.”

Regardless of whether he would be with Lu Zhao or not, regardless of whether he would regain his love or remain single for the rest of his life, those were the paths he had to face, and it had nothing to do with Xu Zhan.

Xu Zhan’s life should have a loving and understanding partner, adopt a cute and lively child, and live a peaceful and happy life until they were old and gray.

Apart from that, he would not accept any other outcome.

So even though Xu Zhan’s embrace was warm, and resting against his shoulder felt secure, he still forced down his sadness and pushed Xu Zhan away.

When he pushed Xu Zhan away, countless water jets gushed out of the fountain, like a downpour.

In this rain and mist, Xia Yu smiled at Xu Zhan and said, “Please, let’s get a divorce, professor Xu.”