Don’t Ignite It chapter 11

Identity

After the intense encounter in bed, Xia Yu lay on the edge of the bed, too exhausted to move a finger.

It had been years since they last met, but Lu Zhao’s skills in bed hadn’t changed at all. He was like a fierce beast, strong and relentless, leaving bite marks all over Xia Yu’s body. The look in his eyes was intense and focused.

Yet, Xia Yu couldn’t help but admit that he liked this side of Lu Zhao.

He enjoyed how forcefully Lu Zhao held him, with sweat dripping from his forehead. Lu Zhao’s usually cold gray-blue eyes burned with desire, making him feel incredibly sexy.

Thinking like this, Xia Yu smiled again.

Lu Zhao noticed and asked, “What are you smiling about?”

Xia Yu shook his head. “Nothing, I just feel that making love with you is even more comfortable than I imagined.”

He arched his back on the bed, propped himself up with a pillow, and looked at Lu Zhao with almost sweet eyes.

That’s why they say a man’s lower half easily controls him.

Just a moment ago, Xia Yu found many things about Lu Zhao annoying, but after a good night’s sleep and their physical entanglement, the resentment in his heart had slowly dissipated.

Xia Yu reached out and poked the red marks on Lu Zhao’s shoulder where he had scratched him. He smiled and said, “You haven’t lost your skills in bed over the years. You’ve been practicing, haven’t you?”

He didn’t mean anything else by it.

He didn’t care if Lu Zhao had other lovers in recent years.

However, Lu Zhao’s expression darkened, as if Xia Yu had struck a nerve.

“I’ve told you before, I haven’t been with anyone else,” Lu Zhao’s voice was flat. “No bed partners, no boyfriends.”

He wasn’t saying this to prove anything to Xia Yu. He knew that Xia Yu didn’t care, but it was the truth.

For the past few years, his heart had been occupied by Xia Yu, and now Xia Yu lay beside him.

But inevitably, he couldn’t help but think that Xia Yu had actually been sharing a bed with another man during these years.

Xu Zhan.

The man who had taken Xia Yu’s hand from his older brother, with Xia Yu and Xu Zhan vowing to spend their lives together as witnesses at their wedding.

Even though Xu Zhan had strayed, the sweet love they had shared in the earlier years wasn’t fake. When Xia Yu looked at Xu Zhan, he had a smile in his eyes and was physically affectionate.

This stung Lu Zhao’s heart.

Lu Zhao lowered his head and looked at Xia Yu for a while, then slipped back under the blanket and kissed Xia Yu again.

With his eyes closed, Xia Yu kissed Lu Zhao drowsily.

He didn’t pay much attention to Lu Zhao’s words.

If he hadn’t found someone else, that was fine. It wasn’t as if he had asked Lu Zhao to remain celibate.

But Lu Zhao’s kisses were addictive, and Xia Yu let out a soft hum, resembling a contented cat. Beneath the covers, he even playfully brushed his toes against Lu Zhao’s leg.

When Lu Zhao opened his eyes and looked at him, Xia Yu curved his lips into an innocent yet mischievous smile.

Their lips parted.

After catching his breath, Xia Yu emerged from under the blanket, took a cigarette from the bedside table, and lit it.

With the flame flickering, Xia Yu held the slender cigarette and took a puff before turning to ask Lu Zhao, “Do you want one?”

Lu Zhao shook his head.

He slowly grasped Xia Yu’s hand and asked in a low voice, “When did you start smoking?”

Xia Yu raised an eyebrow. “Isn’t it because you taught me?”

He had rolled in bed with Lu Zhao after his nineteenth birthday and found Lu Zhao’s post-lovemaking smoking quite sexy. He had insisted on taking a drag, their lips touching where Lu Zhao had just inhaled. His eyes fixed on Lu Zhao, he had tried to seduce him clumsily.

But he had never really picked up smoking, often choking on his attempts, which would make Lu Zhao laugh and call him clumsy.

Looking back now, Lu Zhao wasn’t always cold to him, especially after making love. Lu Zhao’s temperament was almost good during those moments.

It was these insignificant yet intimate moments that had caused Xia Yu to fall deeper and deeper.

Xia Yu chuckled self-deprecatingly, brushing the ash into the ashtray.

Lu Zhao, of course, remembered teaching Xia Yu to smoke.

But he said, “Back then, you always choked on the smoke and only did it for fun. You never even had cigarettes on you; you always came to get mine.”

Xia Yu’s fingers tightened slightly.

“The pressure of work makes me smoke sometimes,” he replied casually.

In truth, he didn’t smoke much now and almost never when he was with someone else. He was afraid of bothering them. He only smoked when he had to work late and felt anxious.

But it was true that he had started smoking more frequently since Lu Zhao left. In the past, he had found the taste of cigarettes a bit harsh, but later, he realized that nothing could be more bitter than being without Lu Zhao.

But there was no point in discussing this now.

Xia Yu’s eyes darted around, changing the subject. “How have you been working abroad these past few years? Has everything been going smoothly?”

Perhaps to avoid him, Lu Zhao had spent most of these years working at the overseas subsidiaries.

In China, it was primarily Lu Zhao’s father, Lu Yuxing, who held the fort.

But in the past year, it seemed that Lu Yuxing was considering handing over full control to his son.

The headquarters of Lu Group was now in Chuan City, having moved here just a year ago.

“It’s nothing special, just a lot of flying and business meetings,” Lu Zhao’s hand gently caressed Xia Yu’s back. “I’ve come back many times in between, but I didn’t dare to see you. I was afraid that if I did, I wouldn’t be able to leave again.”

Xia Yu’s response to this was a light smile, showing that he wasn’t taking it to heart.

With a cigarette in his mouth, leaning against the pillow, he gazed at Lu Zhao with curiosity. He seemed to be unable to restrain his curiosity and suddenly asked, “So, during my wedding with Xu Zhan, where were you?”

Naturally, Xia Yu hadn’t invited Lu Zhao to his wedding.

But for some reason, Xia Yu always felt that Lu Zhao had been there, causing him to subconsciously look outside the flower corridor during the wedding.

But perhaps this was just another one of his wishful thinking moments.

Lu Zhao actually didn’t want to answer this question.

However, he still said, “I was right outside the hotel where your wedding was held, but I didn’t go in. I sat in the car and left almost towards the end of the event.”

He had secretly returned to the country without informing anyone.

While sitting in the car, he imagined the wedding inside the hotel, picturing Xia Yu in a beautiful suit walking down the long rose corridor to Xu Zhan’s side.

At that time, he already had some regrets, the first signs of the aftermath of losing Xia Yu, but he was young and stubborn, too proud to admit his mistakes. He thought he would eventually forget Xia Yu.

So he didn’t play the role of a villain and didn’t show up at the wedding. He had intended to be a dignified ex.

But now, leaning against Xia Yu, he said in a low voice, “I should have come to stop it back then.”

He should have pulled Xia Yu away and left, without worrying about the future, just taking the handsome groom and eloping to the ends of the earth.

Xia Yu was taken aback when he heard this, then smiled lightly and shook his head. “Even if you had tried to stop it, I wouldn’t have gone with you.”

But he knew it was a lie.

If Lu Zhao had really appeared at that time, he would have thrown caution to the wind, abandoned the bouquet, left the groom, and gone anywhere with Lu Zhao.

But that was no longer possible.

These three years had eroded the courage he once had to go all in.

After saying these few words, silence fell in the room once again.

Xia Yu glanced at the phone beside him and realized it was nearly ten o’clock.

He immediately sat up but winced in pain as his hurried movements pulled at his waist.

“I have to go,” he said, extinguishing his cigarette in the ashtray.

Without waiting for any reaction from Lu Zhao, he lifted the blanket, got out of bed, and started getting dressed in front of the mirror.

He stood under the light, now more aware of how disheveled he looked, with marks all over him—bruises and kisses, even on his wrists.

Anyone who saw him could easily tell he had just been intimate with someone.

It was troublesome.

Xia Yu felt a bit weak just standing there, and he couldn’t help but complain to Lu Zhao, “Next time, don’t kiss me on the neck; it’s hard to cover up.”

He didn’t want to use concealer every day.

As he said this, he was still in the process of dressing, putting on a light blue sweater that complemented his fair and delicate skin. His eyes were watery, giving off an innocent and naive aura, but his lips were red and slightly swollen. It was obvious they had been kissed, creating a conflicting and seductive look.

Lu Zhao also got up.

He frowned as he looked at Xia Yu and asked, “Aren’t you staying?”

Xia Yu, however, appeared surprised. “Why would I stay?” He pulled on his jeans. “We’re done; I’m definitely going home at night.”

In Xia Yu’s eyes, he and Lu Zhao didn’t seem like they were in a relationship where they could cuddle and sleep together; once they were done, they would go their separate ways.

But this statement carried a different meaning in Lu Zhao’s ears.

Why would Xia Yu need to rush home like this? It must be because someone was waiting for him at home.

Xia Yu quickly finished dressing. He checked himself in the mirror, noticing that Lu Zhao was also dressed neatly, standing nearby, waiting for him.

Lu Zhao said, “I’ll drive you home.”

“What’s the point of that?” Xia Yu smiled. “I have a car, you know.”

Lu Zhao, however, pointedly glanced at him and said, “Are you in any condition to drive now?”

Xia Yu was momentarily taken aback but then realized that he probably wasn’t.

It had been several years since he had done this, and now his body felt like it had been gnawed on by a dog. He was sore and tired, especially on the inside of his thighs. Even the friction of his jeans made him grimace.

Driving all the way back wouldn’t be comfortable, even though it wasn’t a big deal.

After hesitating for a moment, he said, “Then… how about I take a taxi?”

Lu Zhao, however, ignored his suggestion and said, “I’ll drive you, and I’ll have my assistant bring your car to the gallery downstairs.”

He picked up his car keys and reached out toward Xia Yu.

Xia Yu thought for a moment but didn’t make a fuss. “Alright, then.”

But he didn’t take Lu Zhao’s outstretched hand. Instead, he stepped aside casually and said, “Let’s go.”

After leaving the room 1907, the ambiguous atmosphere that had filled it seemed to have been left behind.

Walking in the dimly lit corridor, Xia Yu and Lu Zhao maintained a distance, not too close and not too far, like two polite friends.

As they descended in the elevator, Xia Yu looked at Lu Zhao in the mirror.

Just a while ago, they had experienced a passionate encounter, but Lu Zhao didn’t seem particularly happy. In fact, he appeared even colder, his eyes weary, giving off an aura that kept people at a distance, as if he were a boss who had just reprimanded his subordinates.

Xia Yu guessed what was on Lu Zhao’s mind.

But he didn’t want to mention it directly. Instead, he smiled and asked Lu Zhao, “Did you find the experience with me dissatisfying? Why do you look so unsatisfied?”

Lu Zhao glanced at him but chose his words carefully. “It’s not that.”

Xia Yu pressed further, “Then why?”

But Lu Zhao remained silent.

Lu Zhao drove Xia Yu back to his home. This time, he didn’t stop at the villa’s entrance but parked some distance away.

From this position, he could see the lights on inside the villa, indicating that Xu Zhan was at home.

Watching Xia Yu unfasten his seatbelt, Lu Zhao suddenly asked, “How are you going to explain this to Xu Zhan?”

“Huh?” Xia Yu didn’t initially grasp the implication.

He looked up and met Lu Zhao’s eyes, which seemed even darker than usual.

Lu Zhao said without expression, “You’re covered in marks left by me, with the scent of our encounter all over you. How are you going to hide it from Xu Zhan?”

One of the gravest dangers of an extramarital affair was being discovered by the spouse.

But Lu Zhao was eager for Xu Zhan to find out, to have Xia Yu and Xu Zhan break up.

However, Xia Yu seemed unconcerned. He smiled casually and said, “Oh, that? Xu Zhan won’t notice. He’s very gentle. If I say I’m not feeling well, he won’t share a room with me.”

The phrase “share a room” pricked at Lu Zhao’s nerves.

But Xia Yu appeared oblivious.

He released his seatbelt and gave Lu Zhao a casual kiss on the cheek.

Whispering near Lu Zhao’s ear, Xia Yu said, “Goodnight. If you want to make plans next time, remember to plan ahead.”

Having said this, he pushed open the car door and got out.

Lu Zhao watched as Xia Yu disappeared into the night.

After a while, he still didn’t leave. He opened the car window and lit a cigarette.

Moments ago, Xia Yu had been lying in his arms.

He lowered his head, his gaze tracing the contours of Xia Yu’s face, seeing him as a lazy cat, smiling at him with a carefree look.

In that instant, he would have a delusional feeling, as if he had never been separated from Xia Yu.

But now Xia Yu was gone.

He was well-dressed, sitting alone in the car, and no one knew what had transpired in the hotel suite an hour ago.

Xia Yu had returned to his husband, and the hidden, obscure relationship they had just established, like a fine thread, was cut off by this closing door.

A long time later, Lu Zhao still hadn’t left. He opened the car window, lit another cigarette, and sat in the darkness. The taste of nicotine burned in his lungs, and every organ in his body ached.

During their lovemaking just now, he had noticed that Xia Yu had never removed his wedding ring, as if reminding him of his current status.

If someone had told Lu Zhao before that he would willingly abandon his morals and pride to become someone’s secret lover, he would have recommended a good psychiatrist to that person.

But now this absurd scene had actually happened.

He willingly surrendered to Xia Yu.

But he couldn’t explain what Xia Yu’s feelings were when he was with him.

Xia Yu had just stood in front of the hotel mirror, smiling at him with a casual and indifferent look, like an unsolved puzzle.