Blinded chapter 71
In the complete darkness, time seemed to freeze, and it was impossible to know how long had passed.
In reality, Xie Li had his phone with him; he could check the time or even use the flashlight. However, he didn’t do so because he wanted to understand what Chang Xiaojia was afraid of.
Chang Xiaojia in his arms gradually became quiet. He stopped trembling visibly, and there were no more panicked sounds, just holding onto Xie Li tightly. Whenever Xie Li moved, he would immediately hold him even tighter, calling him softly with a tender voice, “Xie Li…”
Xie Li would respond, “I’m here. Don’t be afraid.”
Eventually, Xie Li felt tired. He wanted to lie down while still holding him.
Chang Xiaojia reacted strongly, clinging tightly to his neck, saying, “Don’t leave.”
Xie Li said, “I won’t leave. Can we lie down?”
He wrapped one arm around Chang Xiaojia’s back, soothing his anxious emotions, and they lay down on the sofa. It was a bit cramped, so he had Chang Xiaojia lie on the inner side. The narrow space strangely made Chang Xiaojia feel a bit safer in his arms.
Chang Xiaojia’s breathing was rapid and heavy.
After lying down, Xie Li gently kissed his lips.
At first, Chang Xiaojia was a bit sluggish, but he gradually responded awkwardly. He hugged Xie Li tightly, gently rubbing against him. It seemed that getting immersed in other emotions and desires could alleviate his fear.
However, shortly after, Xie Li ended the kiss. He leaned back, still feeling Chang Xiaojia searching for his lips discontentedly. Slowly releasing his grip on Chang Xiaojia’s back, Xie Li turned away from the sofa.
Chang Xiaojia suddenly snapped back to reality. He sat up abruptly, widened his eyes, and, in the room where nothing could be seen, looked around in confusion, trembling as he called out, “Xie Li?”
Xie Li’s throat moved slightly. He tried to muster the courage and calmly asked, “Xiaojia, what did you see?”
Chang Xiaojia turned his head towards the direction of Xie Li’s voice and said softly, “Xie Li, where are you?” He reached out to feel around.
The room wasn’t large, and Xie Li hadn’t moved far. Chang Xiaojia grabbed hold of the hem of his clothes, and he didn’t speak.
Kneeling on the sofa, Chang Xiaojia leaned in to hug him.
Xie Li stood still.
After hugging him for a while without feeling any response, Chang Xiaojia suddenly lifted his head in horror and called out, “Xie Li?”
Not wanting him to be too frightened, Xie Li spoke, “Yes.”
Chang Xiaojia said, “Xie Li, can you hug me?”
Xie Li said, “First, tell me, what did you see in the darkness?” He wanted to know what Chang Xiaojia had experienced and why he was so scared.
Chang Xiaojia’s breathing was particularly audible in the silence. He remained silent for a long time, then slowly loosened his grip on Xie Li’s hands. He curled up in the corner of the sofa.
After waiting for a while, Xie Li had to take the initiative to approach him, asking, “Did Chang Xin hit you?”
Chang Xiaojia didn’t answer.
One leg on the sofa, Xie Li, following Chang Xiaojia’s breathing, found him. With one hand on the back of the sofa and the other on the sofa armrest, Xie Li trapped Chang Xiaojia in front of him, asking, “Why can’t you tell me? What are you afraid of?”
Chang Xiaojia still didn’t respond.
Xie Li was almost disappointed. He thought maybe it was better to hug him and stop him from suffering too much.
Just as he was about to wrap Chang Xiaojia in his arms, he suddenly spoke with a frightened tone, “There’s a door.”
Xie Li was startled, then immediately asked, “What door?”
Chang Xiaojia said, “There’s a crack in the door, and I looked outside through that crack once.”
In an instant, Xie Li felt a tingling sensation on his scalp, as if a dreadful truth awaited him. He subconsciously lowered his voice, as if afraid to disturb Chang Xiaojia. In his softest tone, he asked, “So, what did you see?”
“Quarreling,” Chang Xiaojia said.
“Who was quarreling with whom?”
“Dad and Mom.”
Xie Li asked, “And then?”
“They fought. Dad stood in the way, so I couldn’t see.”
After a moment of thought, Xie Li asked, “How did you leave that dark place later?”
“Dad left, and Mom lay on the bed. I pushed the door open and ran out.”
Xie Li moistened his dry lips and embraced him, letting him lean against his chest. Suddenly, he hesitated to continue questioning.
But Chang Xiaojia continued on his own, saying, “When I went out, I saw Mom’s eyes were open. I was confused. Why didn’t she look at me or call out to me?”
Xie Li pressed his head against his chest.
Chang Xiaojia continued, “I thought Mom was angry, so I went to the yard to pick some flowers for her. When I came back, someone stopped me. They said Mom was dead, and I never saw her again.”
Xie Li suddenly remembered the room where Chang Guanshan was. There was a wardrobe in the room, an old-fashioned one with wooden doors instead of sliding doors.
It seems that was where Chang Xiaojia hid, witnessing his father killing his mother. Perhaps, at that moment, he couldn’t comprehend it, but looking back, he would understand that the last time he saw his mother was when she lay on the bed with lifeless eyes wide open.
Chang Xiaojia’s fear of darkness wasn’t due to being locked up by Chang Xin; it was the nightmare he witnessed hiding in the dark wardrobe that he couldn’t verbalize, making him fear the darkness.
Chang Guanshan, on the other hand, discovered Chang Xiaojia’s fear of the dark and subsequently used the method of locking him in a dark room as a form of threat and punishment.
With Chang Guanshan falling ill, Chang Xiaojia refused to see him because he was afraid to enter that room. He even preferred being locked up in the dark room rather than staying in Chang Guanshan’s room.
Xie Li asked him, “Is it in the room where your dad is now?”
Chang Xiaojia didn’t answer, but suddenly began to tremble. He grabbed Xie Li’s clothes tightly, and due to the intense shaking, his teeth produced a faint clicking sound.
Feeling distressed, Xie Li hugged him tightly, saying, “Don’t be afraid, don’t be afraid. I won’t ask anymore.”
Although he didn’t get an answer, Xie Li still knew. He began to sense Chang Xiaojia’s fear. Chang Guanshan had killed his wife in his room, yet he could live there for so many years without changing his expression. He was probably the most cold-blooded and terrifying person Xie Li had ever encountered. No, he wasn’t human at all, just a demon wearing a human exterior.
When Xie Li snapped out of that moment of fear, he realized that Chang Xiaojia had already fallen asleep in his arms. He gently touched his face, and his fingertips touched a trace of moisture—Chang Xiaojia’s tears. Realizing this, he used his lips to touch Chang Xiaojia’s tears. The taste was bitter and salty, but he reluctantly continued kissing his damp cheeks.