Blinded by Lust chapter 24

The sea breeze blew as Wu Bie stood alone by the railing, lost in thought. The cigarette between his fingers slowly burned down, and the ash fell to the ground. Suddenly, his phone pinged with a notification, pulling him back to reality from the shock of encountering yet another gay couple.

Wu Bie took out his phone and saw that it was a video call request from Zhanyan. His wounded heart desperately needed comfort, so he answered the call with a hint of grievance.

“Hey.”

Seeing that Wu Bie didn’t look well, Zhanyan asked with concern, “Ge, why do you look so pale? Are you feeling unwell?”

From what Huo Zhanyan knew about Wu Bie, with his ironclad physical constitution, it was unlikely he would fall ill, especially since he had seemed fine when messaging him earlier that morning.

Wu Bie opened his mouth but realized no sound came out. He hesitated to speak. After all, being gay was Tan Yi’s personal matter, and it wasn’t appropriate for him to comment on others’ sexual orientation. However, the fact that he had been shocked was undeniable.

“Sigh,” Wu Bie sighed deeply, his tone and expression full of endless melancholy. “Zhanyan, tell me, why are there so many gay people in the world?”

Hearing Wu Bie’s question, Huo Zhanyan’s face instantly changed. He swallowed hard and asked with difficulty, “Why… why would you suddenly say something like that?”

Sensing something was off in Zhanyan’s tone, Wu Bie looked at his phone and saw her serious expression. Wu Bie immediately misunderstood.

“I’m not gay! I wasn’t talking about myself, Zhanyan, don’t misunderstand me!”

Wu Bie quickly distanced himself from the topic of homosexuality, as if afraid of being associated with it.

“I was talking about someone else, someone else! First, it was my best buddy.” Speaking of Chen Xian, Wu Bie was filled with sorrow. They had grown up together, practically inseparable—sharing clothes, peeing together, bathing together, and watching videos together. He had been a decent, honest guy, but now, he’d been led astray by that punk Shen Jixue. Chen Xian had turned out to be…

Wu Bie didn’t dare to think further, trying hard to forget the nightmare-like scenes from before.

“And now, there’s another one… no, two more.” Wu Bie looked thoughtful. “Do you think it’s because there’s something unclean on the ship, or is it because everyone has gone too long without being around women and mutated?”

Wu Bie was completely lost in his own thoughts, unaware that Zhanyan had been silent the whole time. He continued, “Why would they prefer men over good women? Men are stinky and tough, what’s there to like? Don’t they ever fight when they’re together? It’s too scary.”

At this point, Wu Bie suddenly thought of Shen Jixue and Tan Yi. Both of them were quite feminine, so maybe they naturally liked men with a bit more masculinity.

After talking for a while, Wu Bie finally noticed Zhanyan wasn’t saying anything. He glanced down and saw the video call was still active, with Zhanyan staring at him seriously.

“Wha… what’s wrong?”

Why was Zhanyan looking like that? He hadn’t said anything wrong, had he? Could it be that his expression had been too fierce, his tone too harsh, or his words too intense? Wu Bie tried to recall but felt he had been quite restrained.

“Nothing,” Zhanyan lowered her eyes, took a deep breath, and asked calmly, “What if a man liked you?”

Wu Bie’s eyes widened, as if he’d heard something unimaginable. “Zhanyan, don’t scare me!”

Sure, he was handsome, and it was normal for people to find him attractive, but being liked by a man was just…

“What if, I’m just saying, what if?”

For some reason, Zhanyan wouldn’t let go of the topic. Wu Bie scratched his head. In front of Zhanyan, he was somewhat more civilized and restrained, not quick to yell or act rash.

“If someone likes me, there’s nothing I can do about it. But I don’t like men,” Wu Bie chuckled. He looked at Zhanyan with affection and said, “I only like you.”

Wu Bie’s confession didn’t get the response he expected. Instead, Zhanyan looked at him with a complicated expression. After a long pause, she managed a strained smile.

“Who on the ship are you talking about?”

Wu Bie replied casually, “Not sure if you remember, but it’s the kitchen helper who helped me bargain for the gloves. Someone told me a few days ago that he’s gay, but I didn’t take it seriously.”

“Are you close with him?”

Wu Bie furrowed his brows, seriously considering the question. On the ship, the only people he was close to were old colleagues. “Not really. He’s only been on the ship for a short time. He’s introverted and doesn’t fit in with the rough crew. He talks to me a bit more.”

Zhanyan quietly repeated Wu Bie’s words, “Talks to you a bit more?”

Wu Bie, oblivious, laughed, “You know how it is, the ship is full of men, and everyone talks and acts roughly. That kitchen helper is shy and timid. If someone says a couple of words to him, he probably gets too scared to socialize. I’m just more approachable.”

Perhaps it was his gay dar, but Huo Zhanyan felt that the kitchen helper liked Wu Bie for more reasons than Wu Bie had explained.

As someone who was gay, Huo Zhanyan knew all too well what kind of men attracted gay guys. Someone like Wu Bie would undoubtedly spark interest, no matter if they were a “top” or a “bottom.”

Wu Bie’s strong reaction to the idea of homosexuality—it was hard to tell if it was a good thing or not. On a ship filled with men, being homophobic wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. At least Huo Zhanyan didn’t have to worry about anyone making a move on Wu Bie when he wasn’t around.

But what about when they got off the ship? When the two of them met again, would Wu Bie treat him the same way as he treated other gay men? Would he dislike, reject, or even resent him more deeply for the deception?

Wu Bie couldn’t help but feel that every time they talked about homosexuality, the atmosphere between him and Zhanyan became awkward, and Zhanyan seemed unhappy.

“Forget it, let’s not talk about it anymore.” Zhanyan, as always, calmed Wu Bie down. Wu Bie finally felt better and sat on a bench in the corner. “Did your parents leave?”

“Yeah, they left.”

Wu Bie complained a bit, “They don’t visit often; why didn’t they stay longer?”

Though he video-called Zhanyan every day, Wu Bie still felt Zhanyan was too lonely. After all, he wasn’t there with her, and people recovering in the hospital were vulnerable and needed their family most.

Zhanyan quickly replied, “They have things to do. I’m lucky they could visit at all.”

If he pitied himself a little, maybe Wu Bie would feel more sorry for him. By the time the truth came out, would Wu Bie hate him a little less out of pity?

Wu Bie didn’t expect anything from Zhanyan’s parents. “When I come back, I’ll be at the hospital with you every day.”

Wu Bie found this frustrating, all talk and no action. He wasn’t the kind of person who made empty promises.

“Is there anything you want as a gift?” Afraid that Zhanyan might be too embarrassed to say, Wu Bie transferred the last bit of money he had in his WeChat account. “Just buy something for yourself. You’re in China now, and delivery is convenient there. You can have it sent to the hospital. If it’s not enough, let me know, and I’ll figure out how to get more.”

Looking at the payment notification, Huo Zhanyan felt uncomfortable. “Wu Bie, why are you so old-fashioned?”

Why always transfer money? Even though Huo Zhanyan didn’t need it, Wu Bie’s instinctive action of transferring money stirred up complex emotions. He was serious about this, and so was Wu Bie.

Wu Bie laughed at Zhanyan’s words. “I’m thirty years old now, how could I still be fresh? I’m not with you in person, so what else can I do? I can’t just tell you to drink more hot water, right?”

Although Wu felt he was mentally much younger than his peers, he was still ten years older than Zhanyan. His generation just thought like that—if you like someone, you’re willing to spend money. To him, money didn’t matter.

Wu Bie couldn’t just tell Zhanyan, a young girl, to rest and eat well without actually spending money. That would seem too cheap.

“The money you gave me last time is still unused.”

Wu Bie had already given the money to Zhanyan, and what she did with it was her business. He wouldn’t interfere or ask her not to use it.

“There will always be a time when you’ll need it. Keep it. If you don’t, I’ll get a notification all day long. Otherwise, I’ll keep thinking you’re messaging me, get all excited, and then be disappointed.”

Even his way of convincing her to accept the money was smooth. Zhanyan accepted the payment and mumbled, “Why are you so good at sweet-talking people?”

“What do you mean, sweet-talking? These are my heartfelt words. How else could I say them so easily? Isn’t your husband good to you?” Wu Bie wasn’t trying to take advantage of her with words; he just wanted to see her blush.

But Zhanyan simply nodded confidently, making Wu Bie feel embarrassed. After all, he wasn’t very experienced—it was his first time flirting like this.

The two of them sweet-talked each other for a while. Meanwhile, the people who had stayed up all night were gradually waking up. On a ship, there’s always work to be done. When it wasn’t raining, they had to clean the rust and paint the ship. And when it poured, there was the task of cleaning the cabin.

Wu Bie, used to being busy, couldn’t bring himself to slack off. So he reluctantly said goodbye to Zhanyan for now. “I’ll call you later.”

As soon as the video call ended, he felt a sense of emptiness inside. After not dating for so long, he had a bit of that fresh, youthful feeling—like missing someone after being apart for just a little while.

“Sigh,” Wu Bie sighed, glancing at his pitiful bank balance.

No way, a man can’t be broke. Instead of going around asking for money, he decided to ask Chen Xian directly for a transfer. Without hesitation, he sent him a message.

“Xian’er, transfer me some money.”

The reply came quickly, “No.”

Wu Bie held his phone. That tone was definitely not Chen Xian—it had to be Shen Jixue. Suddenly, Wu Bie remembered the call that got cut off last night. It was probably Shen Jixue, too.

“Give the phone back to Chen Xian!”

“Shen Jixue!”

The next day, when he sent the message, he saw that Chen Xian had already blocked him. Furious, Wu Bie immediately made an international call to confront him.

After two rings, Chen Xian answered. “Hello? What’s up?”

“What’s up? How can you even ask that? Ask that Shen guy—does he have the guts to block me using your number? Can you even control your own WeChat?”

Chen Xian probably hadn’t expected Shen Jixue to block Wu Bie, and he called out to him in annoyance, “Ah Xue?”

Then, in his usual calm manner, Shen Jixue responded, “He wanted you to transfer him money. Do you even know where his money goes?”

Chen Xian’s attitude changed completely, completely forgetting about the blocking incident.

“Wu Bie, don’t mess around online. There are a lot of scammers these days. Do you even know about phone scams…”

Before Chen Xian could finish, Wu Bie hung up in frustration. He had no patience to argue with Chen Xian, the disgrace of the shipping company.