Let Me Meet You chapter 21

It’s Fine Not to Like

A night of dreamless sleep.

A light rain fell around midnight, drizzling steadily, and stopped just as the sky began to brighten. Occasionally, a raindrop would fall from the leaves with a soft sound.

Li Xuan actually woke up first, but after yesterday’s exertions, he was still tired. He turned over and tried to continue sleeping. As he moved his arm, he accidentally pressed against Sheng Min’s blanket, which startled him awake.

Sheng Min opened his eyes tiredly and glanced at him. He hadn’t slept for many hours and was feeling drowsy, almost drifting back to sleep, when he suddenly remembered something.

He closed his eyes for less than half a minute before it hit him. He sat up abruptly. “Aren’t you supposed to be in class at school this morning? What time is it?”

“It’s still early…” Li Xuan was still drowsy, raising his hand impatiently to pull him back down. Sheng Min’s pajama collar was loose, and when Li Xuan tugged it, half of his shoulder was exposed. Li Xuan’s fingertip brushed past his shoulder, and in that moment, both of them were fully awake.

“Umh…” Even though the topic was something they’d already discussed, it still felt awkward. The night had a kind of veil that allowed things to remain unspoken, but now, after waking up, the awkwardness couldn’t be avoided. Li Xuan paused, finishing what he had started, “It’s still early. I set an alarm, you can keep sleeping.”

Sheng Min silently adjusted his clothes. Li Xuan felt like he should say something, but couldn’t think of the right words. He raised his hand and scratched his head.

“It’s fine.” Sheng Min spoke first. “After all, it’s your shoulder.”

“But It’s your hand,” Li Xuan retorted, realizing that they had already had a similar conversation when they first met. Now, the roles were reversed, and Li Xuan felt embarrassed.

“I didn’t mean it that way,” he said, flustered.

The more he explained, the worse it seemed.

“I know,” Sheng Min nodded.

Li Xuan opened his mouth but couldn’t think of anything to say. “Alright, as long as you know what I mean. Go back to sleep.”

So, they both lay back down, but this time, neither of them fell asleep.

The sound of their breathing was especially noticeable in the quiet room. Li Xuan kept trying to turn over while pretending to be asleep. Despite Sheng Min’s steady breathing, which clearly indicated he was awake, Li Xuan kept up the act.

By his usual nature, he would never torment himself like this. As he pretended to sleep, he wondered why he was doing it. What was the point? His back ached from staying still, when he suddenly heard Sheng Min softly call his name: “Li Xuan.”

“What?”

“Your alarm went off.”

Only then did Li Xuan realize the alarm was ringing. He reached over to the nightstand and turned it off. He glanced at Sheng Min.

“Time to get up,” Sheng Min said, lifting the blanket. “What do you want for breakfast?”

Li Xuan instinctively avoided his gaze, feeling it was too obvious, but then raised his eyes. Sheng Min noticed his movement but didn’t comment. He asked again, “What do you want? There’s porridge and bread in the fridge.”

“Let’s eat at school.” Li Xuan awkwardly grabbed his clothes and went to the bathroom to change. “The breakfast at our school is decent.”

After the rain, the roads were damp. They left early and saw few pedestrians, with only a few sanitation workers sweeping the acacia flowers that had fallen from the rain.

The two of them didn’t speak on the way. Sheng Min wasn’t familiar with the road near the university, so before they left, he handed the car keys to Li Xuan.

Li Xuan had a driver’s license but didn’t drive often, so his skills were passable. He could still afford to glance at the passenger seat casually and noticed that Sheng Min seemed to be browsing a shopping app, selecting a bed. Li Xuan furrowed his brows, doubting his own eyes, but when the car stopped at a red light, Sheng Min handed him his phone and asked, “Which one do you think is better?”

Li Xuan tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. “I told you I don’t mind.”

“I know you don’t mind,” Sheng Min replied calmly. “I feel awkward.”

“What’s making you feel awkward?” Li Xuan felt a strange irritation inside.

“Because your back was so stiff,” Sheng Min looked at him. “When you went to the bathroom this morning, you almost walked in sync with both feet.”

Li Xuan was startled, and at that moment, the red light turned green.

“Let’s go,” Sheng Min said.

After crossing the intersection, there was an overpass ahead. Li Xuan turned on the left signal and drove up, his tone a bit stiff. “Everything I said last night was genuine. It’s just that this kind of thing takes some time to get used to. Besides that, it’s really no big deal. You’re a guy who likes guys, and I’m a guy too. I’m not scared you’ll try to make a move on me in the middle of the night.”

Sheng Min was silent for a moment, and just when Li Xuan thought he wouldn’t respond, he asked softly, “Are you really not scared?”

“Scared of what?” Li Xuan snapped out of his thoughts and laughed. “Come on, as long as you’re not some kind of creep, you’re not going to fall for every guy you see just because you’re gay.”

“We’ve known each other for quite a while now.” Sheng Min kept his eyes on the road, his voice soft. “And even if you don’t like me, that’s okay too.”

Li Xuan looked at him twice, then turned his gaze away, silent. After driving a bit further, he suddenly pulled over to the side of the road.

“Are we there?” Sheng Min looked out the window.

Li Xuan didn’t answer. Instead, he unfastened his seatbelt and leaned over.

“What are you doing?” Sheng Min instinctively frowned and leaned back. Li Xuan kept getting closer until Sheng Min’s back was against the car door. Finally, he spoke up, “Go ahead and touch. If you’re going to, there’s no need to wait until nighttime. You can do it in broad daylight too. With how things are between us, who’s to say who’s taking advantage of who?”

Sheng Min was stunned, thinking he had misheard. He looked at Li Xuan, shocked.

Li Xuan met his gaze nonchalantly.

Sheng Min swallowed, his Adam’s apple moving slightly. “I wasn’t… I just…”

“Are you going to do it or not? Hurry up.”

Li Xuan’s tone was calm, his warm breath brushing near Sheng Min’s collarbone. Sheng Min, completely thrown by Li Xuan’s unpredictable behavior, reached out to push him away. “Sit back.”

“Not pretending anymore?” Li Xuan saw Sheng Min’s ears quickly turning red again and snickered. “With that little courage of yours and how easily embarrassed you get, were you really trying to scare me with this?”

Li Xuan still had a faint fig scent on him. Sheng Min, seeing him retreat, sat back up and took a deep breath, not saying anything.

“You’ve been thinking about it all morning, haven’t you?” Li Xuan raised an eyebrow. “You thought I was just comforting you last night, saying I didn’t mind to make you feel better, while I was actually annoyed to death, and you had to play along and pretend to believe me?”

Sheng Min pressed his lips together. Li Xuan, leaning his elbow on the car window, lazily said, “I was a bit awkward this morning because I accidentally touched you, and I was worried you’d feel uncomfortable. Honestly, you could’ve just said you were scared I’d make a move on you at night—that would’ve sounded more believable.”

At that, Sheng Min recalled how close Li Xuan had been just now, but he had indeed been careful not to touch him. If this were a few days ago, Li Xuan probably would have been more forward.

A complicated feeling rose in Sheng Min’s heart as he glanced at him briefly. Li Xuan said casually, “I don’t have much patience, you know that. This is the last time I’m explaining it. But if you’re still uncomfortable and want to buy a new bed, go ahead. I think the first one you picked is fine. Anything bigger wouldn’t fit well in your study. You’re funny, though. Last night, you kept saying you didn’t mind, so why are you fussing now?”

For some reason, Sheng Min felt like laughing. He lowered his head and let out a silent chuckle. “I thought you didn’t even look at it, but you actually picked one out.”

Leaning back into his seat, he seemed to relax for the first time that morning. After a pause, he whispered, “Thanks.”

“Is this really something to thank me for? Isn’t that exhausting? It’s your personal business.” Li Xuan yawned lazily. “It doesn’t matter whether anyone else accepts it. You don’t need to thank me just because I do. And if anyone can’t accept it, that’s their problem, not yours. If someone ever talks crap about you, you’re allowed to snap back.”

“Would you snap back?”

“As long as they’re not like your manager, who always butts into things, I don’t care what people say.” Li Xuan glanced at him. “But that doesn’t apply to you. You do care.”

Sheng Min lowered his eyes and, after a moment, smiled. “Li Xuan.”

“What now?”

“You’re different from how you were when we first met.”

“You noticed, huh?” Li Xuan scoffed, and Sheng Min added, “You didn’t talk this much back then.”

Li Xuan frowned. “Looking for a fight, are you?”

Sheng Min laughed, his shoulders shaking slightly.

“Laugh all you want. Just don’t overthink things.” Li Xuan pulled open the car door.

“Where are you going?”

“We’re here. Get out.” Li Xuan reached over for his mask and cap. “Or did you think I parked on the main road just to chat with you?”

Li Xuan had parked in an empty area in front of a sports complex. Crossing through the back entrance and over the road, they would arrive at the gates of N University.

It was one of the country’s top universities, with a long history. Even though this was a newer campus area, they had transplanted many ancient trees, and in the summer, the branches and leaves blocked half the sunlight, leaving a hint of coolness along the shaded paths.

“Do you study here?” Sheng Min followed him inside, unable to resist asking.

“I teach here,” Li Xuan replied dryly. “Wipe that disbelief off your face.”

“It’s not that I don’t believe you,” Sheng Min muttered, feeling a bit guilty. He wasn’t all that familiar with universities in the country, but he’d heard of N University’s reputation. He could tell Li Xuan was intelligent, but the kind of ideal student he’d imagined didn’t exactly look like him.

“What’s your major?” Sheng Min changed the topic, remembering that Li Xuan was often coding in his study. “Computer science?”

“Physics.”

Sheng Min looked surprised. Li Xuan didn’t elaborate, and as they spoke, they arrived at the cafeteria.

“Want some soup dumplings?”

“Huh?” Sheng Min was caught off guard by the abrupt topic shift. “Sure, anything’s fine.”

“Alright, let’s go, then. Second floor.” Li Xuan tugged his mask higher and headed inside.