Blinded by Lust chapter 34

The mild concussion wasn’t too serious. After just two days of rest, Huo Zhanyan was mostly fine, though his face was still bruised, a clear sign he had been in a fight.

But he had no time to worry about that. He had tried sending many WeChat messages to Wu Bie, but got no reply. He even attempted to contact Wu Bie through his latest video channel, but Wu Bie hadn’t responded. They weren’t friends on the platform, so after sending the first message, he couldn’t send any more.

“Wu Ge, I know you’re very angry, but please don’t ignore me.” Huo Zhanyan held his phone, feeling helpless. Even though Wu Bie had returned to the country, they seemed to be drifting further apart. Huo Zhanyan’s fingers hovered over Chen Xian’s number. Should he call Chen Xian again?

That thought quickly passed. Knowing Wu Bie, he wouldn’t want anyone, even Chen Xian, to know about their situation. Huo Zhanyan didn’t want to be hated by Wu Bie any more than he already was. If it wasn’t absolutely necessary, he couldn’t embarrass him.

Wu Bie had already returned to the country. Even if he didn’t know Wu Bie’s home address, he knew the company’s address. If he wanted to find Wu Bie, it wouldn’t be difficult. The hard part was whether Wu Bie would be willing to meet him, and if he did, whether he’d be angry.

If he were still the previous Zhanyan, it would have been much easier when Wu Bie was around. Wu Bie wouldn’t have even held a grudge against him. But now, he was Huo Zhanyan—not only a man but a man who, in Wu Bie’s mind, had played with him and was a gay man.

“Sigh.” Huo Zhanyan sighed deeply, and just then, the phone under his pillow vibrated. He hurriedly took it out, and when he saw the caller ID marked as “Big Brother,” his excitement diminished by half. 

“Hello?”

“Hello?” Huo Zhanxing mimicked Huo Zhanyan’s lifeless tone, sounding gloomy. “What kind of tone is that? Is this how you answer your big brother’s call?”

Huo Zhanyan wasn’t in the mood to argue. “What do you want? If there’s nothing, I’m hanging up. I need to rest.”

“You’ll regret hanging up.”

At that age of eighteen or nineteen, torn by love and driven by curiosity, Huo Zhanyan hesitated for a moment.

Seeing that Huo Zhanyan didn’t hang up, Huo Zhanxing continued leisurely, “Even though you asked for help finding someone as your birthday gift, I still decided to give you a chance. I got you a brand-new model of motorcycle. I’m going on a business trip in a couple of days, and the keys are with Zhanting. When you’re ready, she’ll give them to you. But no speeding—stay safe.”

If it weren’t for being so troubled by Wu Bie, Huo Zhanyan would’ve been thrilled by this birthday gift from his big brother.

“What? Don’t like it?”

Just moments ago, Huo Zhanyan had been cold and distant, but now he softened. “No, thank you, Ge.”

“Why so down?” Huo Zhanxing could tell something was wrong, but it didn’t seem to be directed at him. “What’s going on?”

Huo Zhanyan felt trapped and needed to talk. “Hypothetically, I mean if I had a friend, and that friend made someone really mad—so mad they might never forgive him—what would you do?”

The question was ambiguous, like it was about a love relationship, but since Huo Zhanyan rarely sought his opinion, Huo Zhanxing didn’t tease him.

“Well, that depends on what you want. Do you want to reconcile or never speak again?”

Huo Zhanyan didn’t even notice his brother’s shift to “you” as the subject. He hurriedly answered, “Of course I want to reconcile!”

“Then let the other person cool off first, and then just be persistent. Since you want to reconcile, you’ll have to swallow your pride a bit. Don’t care about saving face.”

Huo Zhanyan followed his brother’s words entirely. “I don’t care about my pride, but he’s ignoring me. He’s really angry. He must hate me now.”

Who could this be? Someone who could make his proud younger brother this humble. Huo Zhanxing thought about how Huo Zhanyan always had admirers growing up, yet he never took an interest in anyone. Now, who could be making him suffer like this?

“You already said he’ll never forgive you, so why do you care if he hates you? Do you want to be hated or forgotten?”

This struck a chord with Huo Zhanyan. He’d rather cling to Wu Bie forever, even if Wu Bie hated him, than watch him move on with someone else.

The phone line went quiet, as if Huo Zhanyan was thinking deeply. Huo Zhanxing joked, “What? Did someone dump you?”

Not exactly. Huo Zhanyan didn’t want to admit it. After all, Wu Bie only beat him up; he never actually said they broke up.

Stubborn, Huo Zhanyan insisted, “No, he’s just mad.”

“Who is it?”

Suddenly, Huo Zhanyan realized his brother was prying. “No one. Aren’t you going on a business trip? Be careful on the road.”

“Wow, using me and ditching me now that you’ve crossed the river, huh?”

Huo Zhanyan didn’t argue. “I’m hanging up.”

….

Since Wu Bie wasn’t going to sea, he had to show up to work daily and clock in like any other employee. Even if there was nothing to do, he had to sit in the office until two or three in the afternoon.

Wu Bie wasn’t sure what to do in the office. No one assigned him any work, so he simply put on a movie to pass the time.

Even during a fast-paced action movie, he found himself nodding off, only to be startled awake by a knock on the door.

“Come in.”

The door opened slightly, and Chen Xian poked his head in. “Aren’t you going to replace your SIM card?”

Wu Bie, still groggy, rubbed his face, trying to wake up. “I’ll just use the new number for now.”

“But you haven’t been on WeChat. People who don’t know your new number can’t find you, and they’ve been calling me instead.”

Wu Bie wanted to cancel his old SIM card altogether, but too many things—bank accounts, apps, and utility payments—were tied to the number. It was too much hassle, so he kept postponing it. However, he had no desire to keep his old WeChat and video accounts.

“Just give them my new number. I’ll get a new WeChat account soon, maybe in a couple of days.”

Something was off with Wu Bie, but he refused to explain.

Chen Xian asked, “I’m heading out to pick up Ah Xue. Want to come along?”

Wu Bie gave him a look as if he were stupid. “Why would I go? I don’t want to pick up Shen Jixue.”

“So we can all head home together.”

“No thanks. I’ll head home on my own later.” Wu Bie knew Chen Xian was worried about him and didn’t want to leave him alone, but Wu Bie wasn’t about to do anything foolish. He just wanted to be alone. He couldn’t stand couples, especially gay couples.

Around five o’clock, most people had left the office. Once it got quiet, the emptiness made Wu Bie feel restless, so he grabbed his keys and left for home.

Many people had gone home, so there weren’t many cars in the garage. The lighting in the underground garage was poor, making everything look dark and gloomy. From a distance, Wu Bie noticed something placed on the hood of his car.

“Damn! Someone better not have scratched my car. I’ve had enough bad luck already…”

He jogged over and realized it was a bouquet of flowers, with a letter tucked underneath.

His heart wasn’t racing, but he felt a sense of numbness. He didn’t bother to read the letter, grabbing the flowers and the envelope, intending to toss them into the nearby trash can. But as soon as he touched the flowers, some weird mechanism triggered, and a familiar yet eerie voice played.

“I’m sorry.”

The sudden sound startled Wu Bie, and he almost dropped everything in his hands.

Upon closer inspection, he saw a red indicator light flashing inside. It was a voice recorder that played when touched. The person who left it likely knew Wu Bie wouldn’t read the letter, so they had a backup plan.

Wu Bie took a deep breath. “Come out.”

The dimly lit underground garage was illuminated by a few weak motion-sensor lights. Wu Bie, growing impatient, raised his voice.

“I said, come out!”

A tall figure emerged from behind a pillar. Even though the lighting was bad and there was some distance between them, Wu Bie recognized it was Huo Zhanyan. His fists clenched instinctively.

“Wu Bie…” Huo Zhanyan began to speak just as the motion-sensor light overhead brightened. Unfortunately, the lighting wasn’t great. The dim yellow light hit the top of his head, with his bangs obscuring most of his face, making it hard to see his expression. “I came to apologize.”

“How did you find my car?” Wu Bie was irritated. If Huo Zhanyan had been prying into his personal life, he was definitely going to make him pay.

Huo Zhanyan quickly explained, “I saw your car in the hospital parking lot that day. Since it was unfamiliar to me, it stuck in my memory, so…”

Wu Bie relaxed a little, casually placing the flowers and letter on the trash can lid nearby. “No need, take your stuff and leave.”

Judging by his appearance, Huo Zhanyan’s injuries seemed to have healed. He might be fine now, but Wu Bie was worried he might get so angry that he’d beat him up again.

Huo Zhanyan stood still. Before seeing Wu Bie, he’d rehearsed this moment in his head countless times. But facing Wu Bie’s cold attitude, he realized how hard it was to speak.

“Can you just let me finish? I only have three hours before I need to go back to the hospital.” Huo Zhanyan pleaded. Seeing that Wu Bie remained silent, he continued, “I deceived you intentionally, and I apologize for that. But I truly like you. From the moment I saw your first video, I was drawn to you. Except for the issue of my gender, I never lied about anything else. I know you don’t like men, so I pretended to be a girl to get closer to you. I wasn’t playing you. I knew you’d be angry, but I had no other choice. I’m sincere.”

The vast underground garage fell into a long silence, so quiet that Huo Zhanyan could hear his own heartbeat. He clenched his jaw, anxiously awaiting Wu Bie’s response.

After a while, Wu Bie’s calm yet cold voice broke the silence. “Are you done talking? If so, you can leave now.”

Huo Zhanyan felt like his heart had fallen into an ice pit. “No matter what the reason is, you’ll never forgive me, right? I don’t have any chance, do I?”

“Isn’t it obvious? I don’t like men.”