I Only Want You chapter 11

The sign language from Yan Lan and the indifferent expression on his face made it seem as if Xie Yun Zhi was an inconsequential person to him. Whether it was because of this or not, in this “conversation,” he seemed to subtly gain the upper hand.

Xie Yun Zhi remained silent for a while, shaking his head with unclear emotions. “It’s not compensation. I just don’t want to accept a new art teacher every day…”

Before he could finish, Yan Lan began shaking his head, rejecting the idea. “It’s not suitable. Even if it’s for Tiantian, I can’t agree. He may not be used to it now, but he’ll get used to it over time. I can’t be his art teacher forever.”

Yan Lan’s refusal was firm, as if the words “I only want you” were just a dream for Xie Yun Zhi. It seemed that Xie Yun Zhi’s response that morning, “I’m not gay,” had already turned them into people from two different worlds. If it weren’t for a text message from Xie Yun Zhi, they might never have had a chance to see each other again.

Xie Yun Zhi looked at Yan Lan, whose eyes avoided his gaze. “Are you angry?”

Yan Lan shook his head slowly. “I just think we no longer need to have any contact or meet again.”

“I can pretend that nothing happened.”

Yan Lan continued shaking his head. “But I can’t.”

In his heart, Xie Yun Zhi also understood that at this point, it was best for them not to have any contact. Yan Lan liked him, but he couldn’t reciprocate. Even for Tiantian’s sake, he shouldn’t contact Yan Lan again. It was not beneficial for either of them.

However, after that day, he would often think of Yan Lan during his free time. He would recall the gentle face he saw when he was drunkenly blurry. Compared to the present Yan Lan, it felt like they were two different people. This contrast made his heart feel as if it had been scratched by invisible claws—a sensation that wasn’t painful but left an itching feeling.

What he found unbearable during these almost ten days was the fact that, if he didn’t initiate contact with Yan Lan, they would gradually become strangers.

This was the first time he felt like this. The moment he thought about it, his heartbeat lost its normal rhythm. He didn’t quite understand why, but he might have realized that he would regret it if things continued like this.

So, after receiving a complaint from a new art teacher about Tiantian disrupting class time, he didn’t give himself much time to hesitate and struggle. He sent a text to Yan Lan, asking to meet.

Only after taking this step did he realize that it wasn’t as difficult as he had imagined. After receiving Yan Lan’s confirmation that he would come, Xie Yun Zhi even felt a faint sense of relief.

However, he didn’t expect Yan Lan’s reaction to be like this.

He himself was a businessman who spent almost the entire year negotiating business deals worldwide. Maximizing the success of Venus Jewelry and maximizing profits were his primary concerns. Therefore, weighing the pros and cons had become his instinct, or one could say, a subconscious reaction.

After a not-so-long silence, he softly asked, “Can you give me some time to consider?”

Yan Lan’s heart shook at the words, and he looked at Xie Yun Zhi in disbelief, his indifferent expression faintly dissolving.

“As I said that day, I’m not gay.” After saying this, Xie Yun Zhi paused for a few seconds, seemingly contemplating how to phrase his next words. “I don’t want to hurt you, and I don’t want to have no relationship with you. It’s just that I might need some time to make a decision that I can consider regretless.”

During this pause, Yan Lan’s gaze remained on his face as if he didn’t want to miss any expression, trying to discern whether what Xie Yun Zhi said was true or false.

After a while, Yan Lan suddenly took out his phone from his pocket, opened the notes app, typed, and then placed the phone in front of Xie Yun Zhi: “Are you saying I can pursue you?”

Yan Lan chose to type this sentence rather than use sign language to ensure that every word was precise. Xie Yun Zhi was momentarily stunned but then suddenly realized.

Being confronted with his own unconscious thoughts made his calm heartbeat gradually intensify. Upon careful consideration, he realized that what he said earlier could be interpreted in a much simpler and straightforward way, even in one sentence: “I’m not gay, but you can try to change that.”

Xie Yun Zhi was on the verge of laughing at his own foolishness, and indeed, he did chuckle. His lips curved slightly, and the cold, sharp look softened with genuine amusement. “That works too.”

Yan Lan silently put away his phone, nodding.

Xie Yun Zhi, feeling a flutter in his heart as he watched Yan Lan, subconsciously asked, “Are you willing to sign a new part-time contract?”

Unable to resist, Yan Lan lowered his head, sighed, and typed on his phone, “If I don’t sign it, can I still pursue you?”

Xie Yun Zhi was puzzled. “…It’s not about that.”

Yan Lan put away his phone and glanced at him with a faint disdain. He then nodded.

Seeing Yan Lan’s reaction, Xie Yun Zhi’s heart skipped a beat. He asked involuntarily, “When will you go see Tiantian?”

Yan Lan gently shook his head. “I don’t know. The beginning of the semester is busy. Maybe I’ll have time this Saturday.”

“I understand. When you’re leaving, send me a message, and I’ll arrange for someone to pick you up.”

Yan Lan waved off the offer. “I can go by myself. If there’s nothing else, I need to go back.”

Xie Yun Zhi nodded, stood up, and picked up the suit jacket hanging on the side. “I’ll take you back.”

This time, Yan Lan didn’t refuse and got into the Bentley with him.

A few minutes later, the car stopped in front of the gate of the art school. Yan Lan nodded in thanks, pushed open the car door, and walked away without looking back.

Xie Yun Zhi sat in the back seat, his gaze firmly fixed on the figure getting farther and farther away through the car window. He continued watching until it was no longer visible before instructing the driver to start the car.

As Yan Lan entered the campus of the art school, he walked faster and faster. When he passed the playground, he suddenly broke into a run, weaving through numerous freshmen who were free to move around after military training. He ran all the way back to the dormitory building, just in time to see Yang Xiaole carrying his canvas bag and holding a bag of salad.

If he could speak, he would have shouted out loud the moment he saw that familiar figure: “Lele!”

But he couldn’t speak. All he could do was run towards that figure with shining eyes. When Yang Xiaole heard the footsteps and turned back in confusion, Yan Lan reached out, grabbed his wrist, and started running together. They ran up three flights of stairs and pushed open the dormitory door.

Yang Xiaole, inexplicably dragged into a stair-climbing sprint, was panting and feeling a bit dizzy. “Why… Why are you running? Is someone chasing you from behind?”

Yan Lan picked up a pen and paper from the table. His hand holding the pen was shaking, making the characters on the paper look crooked. It was almost indistinguishable as regular script.

Yang Xiaole put down what he was holding, and by the time he raised his head, Yan Lan had handed him the notebook. On the plain white pages were some slightly skewed characters.

[I can pursue Xie Yun Zhi now.]

Yang Xiaole stared at the line of words for several seconds. “…. Huh?”

Yan Lan grabbed the notebook back and continued to write with trembling hands.

[I just met Xie Yun Zhi. He said he needs time to consider.]

Yang Xiaole finally understood but was still a bit dazed. “Didn’t he say he’s not gay?”

[So he said he needs time to consider.]

“If he still says he’s not gay after considering, then what?”

[Then I’ll accept it. Listen to you and forget about him.]

Yang Xiaole’s eyes gradually lit up, and the joy on his face seemed as if he wasn’t the person who wanted to throw Xie Yun Zhi into the sea a few days ago.

“That’s great! If he’s willing to consider, it means he has you in his heart!” Yang Xiaole tightly held Yan Lan’s wrist, his eyes shining. “Yan, you have to seize this opportunity! Don’t leave any regrets!”

Yan Lan nodded firmly.

“Good, go get Master a glass of water. Master will teach you how to pursue someone.”

Obediently, Yan Lan went to get him a glass of water. When he came back, he picked up the pen and wrote, “Have you pursued anyone before?”

Yang Xiaole took a sip of water and shook his head. “No, but I’ve seen others do it. You can trust me; I won’t be wrong.”

Yan Lan nodded.

“Firstly, humans are visual creatures. Except for special groups or those with peculiar preferences, the majority of humans are attracted to good-looking individuals. You should be well aware of this.”

Yang Xiaole reached out and pinched the smooth and elastic cheek on Yan Lan’s face, making his slightly red lips pout. “You must maximize the advantage of this face and showcase it to the fullest.”

Yan Lan listened with a puzzled expression.

“I know you usually have a cold face to scare off strangers and avoid awkward situations of communication. However, it’s not suitable to have a cold face when facing someone you like. They’ll think you don’t like them that much. So, the first thing you need to learn now is not to have a cold face when facing Xie Yun Zhi.”

Yan Lan seemed to understand but not entirely. Yang Xiaole used two fingers to lift the corners of his lips. “You need to eliminate the distance on you, but not completely. You have to maintain a sense of closeness, yet still give off an ambiguous feeling, a cat-and-mouse game. Men fall for this trick.”

Yan Lan nodded.

“When you left, did he say anything?”

Yan Lan shook his head, then thought for a moment and wrote in the notebook about the incident at Forest Coffee, where he declined Xie Yun Zhi’s offer to pick him up on Saturday.

Yang Xiaole looked at it, surprised, and glanced at Yan Lan with some disbelief. “So, you’re an expert…”

Yan Lan picked up the pen and drew a question mark on the paper.

Scratching his head, Yang Xiaole said, “What I said earlier is almost the same. Instead of saying you’ll definitely go on Saturday, just say it’s possible. He’ll keep thinking about you on Saturday and will definitely contact you early in the day. Just wait.”

Yan Lan listened with skepticism, but when Saturday arrived, around 10 a.m., he did receive a text from Xie Yun Zhi.

“Teacher Yan, Tiantian keeps asking me when you’ll come to see him.”

Yan Lan raised an eyebrow. “Tiantian is asking about me?”

“Yeah, his Titanic model at the front is only half assembled. Once you’re done, come over.”

“At what time? Does Tiantian have classes today?”

“No, I gave him the day off. He can rest today.”

“I’ll come over earlier then.”

After these messages, Xie Yun Zhi didn’t reply. Yan Lan put down his phone and continued drawing.

In the afternoon, after lunch, Yang Xiaole helped him choose clothes. Yan Lan compared two seemingly similar T-shirts repeatedly before settling on one that was indigo blue, with snow-capped mountains and snowflakes printed on it.

“This one is good, complements your skin tone. Come on, spray some perfume too. I think this one suits you better. It’s a women’s fragrance, but it’s light and matches your temperament.”

If Yan Lan were a girl, Yang Xiaole would probably have dug out his hidden dresses and lipstick by now.

But Yan Lan was a boy, and he didn’t even need eyebrow pencils. He could only put in extra effort elsewhere.

Yan Lan obediently followed his fussing. The final result seemed almost the same as usual at first glance, but upon closer inspection, it was evident that he had been well-groomed.

After circling around him, Yang Xiaole reluctantly nodded. “Alright, go. Be careful on the way.”

Yan Lan found it amusing and picked up the notebook to write: Xie Yun Zhi might not even see me. He’s busy with work.

“Well, then it’s his loss. Have fun.”

Carrying his canvas bag, Yan Lan went out. He took a bus from the south gate and even bought a piece of fruit cake on the way. By the time he reached Xie’s house, it was about the time he used to teach Tiantian during the summer vacation.

Auntie greeted him enthusiastically and led him upstairs to find Tiantian.

“Ever since you stopped working part-time, Tiantian’s mood has been very bad. He often throws tantrums. Almost all the teachers complained to Secretary Lin that Tiantian is mischievous. President Xie came back a few times, and whenever Tiantian saw him, he would use sign language to ask why you weren’t coming.”

Listening to this, Yan Lan felt a pang in his chest. He was surprised that Tiantian missed him so much. He thought the kid would just take some time to adjust, and it would be okay if he didn’t come. Unexpectedly, Tiantian had been thinking about him for these days.

Auntie opened Tiantian’s bedroom door, and Tiantian, wearing light blue overalls, was sitting on the carpet, surrounded by Lego blocks.

He was facing away from the bedroom door and couldn’t hear any sound, so he didn’t know someone had entered until he saw a pair of feet. He lifted his eyes in confusion, and for a brief ten seconds of silent eye contact, he met Yan Lan’s gaze.

After this long silence, Tiantian arrogantly raised his hand, patting the empty space next to him, signaling Yan Lan to sit. His delicate little face looked serious, and even his sign language movements were expressed with great seriousness: Did my uncle bully you?