Don’t Ignite It chapter 40
Fragile
When Xia Yu entered the ward again, Lu Zhao was already awake, leaning on the bed and continuing to read the documents his secretary had brought.
Xia Yu stood at the door, couldn’t help rolling his eyes. If Lu Zhao were truly a robot, one of his factory settings must be “work until death.”
Lu Zhao heard the movement at the door and raised his head, locking eyes with Xia Yu.
Xia Yu slowly walked over, sat down in a chair beside Lu Zhao, and in the few steps he took, Lu Zhao’s gaze followed him, fixing directly on his face.
Lu Zhao, upon waking up, was far from the quiet and fragile state he was in when he was asleep. He now looked unbreakable.
“Why did you come?” Lu Zhao asked softly, his tone devoid of emotion.
Xia Yu replied casually, “Lu Yuan called and said you were sick, so he asked me to come check on you.”
Xia Yu threw Lu Yuan under the bus without a hint of guilt.
Lu Zhao furrowed his brow but didn’t say anything.
Truthfully, he didn’t want Xia Yu to see him in this sickly state. He looked pale and lifeless, much like the sterile, white room he was in. Xia Yu wouldn’t like that.
However, he continued to stare at Xia Yu, and after several days apart, Xia Yu looked vibrant in comparison. His eyes were bright, he was dressed in a light-colored shirt, and he had a small cat-shaped earring on his ear.
Lu Zhao’s heart twinged.
Reluctantly, he thought that maybe this meant Xia Yu had been happy by Xu Zhan’s side these past few days.
An unfaithful husband hadn’t made Xia Yu wilt. He still looked as beautiful as a rose. He slept with Xu Zhan in the same bed, visited an orphaned child together, and discussed whether they should adopt him.
This made Lu Zhao’s stomach ache again, and he coughed softly, wincing from the pain.
Xia Yu felt uneasy under his gaze.
Before coming to the hospital, he had thought he would just check on Lu Zhao’s condition and leave. But now that he was here, seeing Lu Zhao lying in the hospital bed, he felt a bit sorry for him.
They had been together for several years, and Xia Yu had hardly seen Lu Zhao sick. On the rare occasion when he did get sick, it was just a minor cold that cleared up in a few days. On the other hand, Xia Yu himself had some health issues – fevers, stomach problems, and even appendicitis – none of which were serious, but they were quite bothersome. When he had his appendix removed, Lu Zhao had been with him, despite saying he wouldn’t care.
Thinking about this, Xia Yu softened a bit, especially seeing Lu Zhao’s poor condition. His lips were pale, and he looked like a pale statue.
He reached into the fruit basket on the bedside table, took out a kiwi and a fruit knife, and slowly started peeling it. He asked Lu Zhao, “How did you manage to get yourself to the point of a bleeding stomach? Doesn’t anyone around you take care of you? Do you think you’re invincible?”
In Lu Zhao’s position, with so many people around him, someone should be eager to take care of him.
But Lu Zhao replied, “Who would take care of me?”
His voice was calm, merely stating a fact. His mother had passed away, his father had delegated his responsibilities, and most of the time, he lived with his lover. Besides his subordinates, there was his cousin Lu Yuan, but even Lu Yuan couldn’t control him.
Lu Zhao lowered his gaze and added softly, “You don’t take care of me either.”
But after saying this, he seemed to regret it and tightly sealed his lips.
He wasn’t used to showing weakness, but during these days of illness, besides focusing on his treatment and work, he found himself constantly wondering what Xia Yu was doing.
He didn’t want Xia Yu to see him in such a pathetic state, but he also longed for the warmth of Xia Yu’s touch.
So, when Xia Yu actually showed up, his unfiltered feelings slipped out.
Xia Yu’s knife stopped.
This didn’t sound like something Lu Zhao would say. It was a slightly childish complaint, the kind he only revealed to those closest to him.
But it wasn’t the first time Xia Yu had heard it. A long time ago, when he was still Lu Zhao’s “friend with benefits,” there was a night when Lu Zhao had been working on a project for half a month, and he had leaned on Xia Yu’s shoulder, saying how tired he was.
At that time, Lu Zhao had been playing with his fingers, and his tone had softened, likely due to alcohol. He seemed both drunk and not drunk, even leaning over to kiss him. But the next day, Lu Zhao had forgotten it all.
Xia Yu continued peeling the kiwi, finally finishing it with a lumpy appearance. He cut a piece and handed it to Lu Zhao with a fork.
He didn’t provoke Lu Zhao with any cold words this time. A sick person would always receive sympathy, and he said, “I’m here to visit you, after all.”
Lu Zhao looked at the kiwi, took a bite, and the fruit given by Xia Yu was always overly sweet. But now, even though it was filled with sugar, it tasted bitter to him.
He thought that if Lu Yuan hadn’t called, Xia Yu probably wouldn’t have come even if he knew Lu Zhao was sick.
But he didn’t say anything, acknowledging the comfort Xia Yu provided.
After finishing the kiwi, Lu Zhao asked, “Did you and Xu Zhan go see that child over the weekend?”
The question caught Xia Yu off guard.
“Uh… yes.”
Xia Yu’s heart skipped a beat, wondering why Lu Zhao brought this up.
Lu Zhao continued, “Do you like that child?”
Xia Yu hesitated for a moment. He liked the child, but it didn’t seem like they were ready to adopt him yet. The idea of having a child, wedged between him and Xu Zhan, made him somewhat anxious. Perhaps, subconsciously, he knew he couldn’t bear that responsibility.
“He’s okay. He’s pretty cute, and Xu Zhan likes him a lot.”
Xia Yu gave a vague answer.
He avoided Lu Zhao’s gaze and said, “the child is well behaved, and Xu Zhan seems like he can take care of him”
Lu Zhao pressed on, still looking at him intently. “What about you? What do you feel? Do you want to adopt him?”
Xia Yu averted his eyes.
“I think it’s a good idea. Anyway, Xu Zhan will take care of the child.”
After saying this, the atmosphere in the hospital room grew colder.
Lu Zhao leaned back on the soft pillow, his face slightly contorted with pain, as if a certain part of his stomach was hurting too much to bear, and he turned pale.
Xia Yu had never seen Lu Zhao like this before and was taken aback. He didn’t have much experience taking care of patients and instinctively pressed the call button.
“Are you okay?” He felt helpless, not knowing what to do and not daring to touch Lu Zhao.
Lu Zhao shook his head and struggled to say, “I’m fine.”
Before long, a doctor arrived, listened to Lu Zhao’s heart rate, measured his blood pressure and temperature, and examined him.
Fortunately, Lu Zhao didn’t have any serious issues. The doctor said he was improving, but added casually, “Don’t get too excited; avoid emotional ups and downs.”
Though the doctor was simply giving advice, Xia Yu couldn’t help but feel guilty.
After the doctor left, it was just Lu Zhao and Xia Yu in the hospital room.
Xia Yu touched his nose, wondering if he felt guilty. He said to Lu Zhao, “Do you still feel uncomfortable anywhere? Can I do something for you?”
Lu Zhao looked at him for a moment, then patted the bed beside him. “Can you come over here?”
Xia Yu moved closer and sat on the edge of the bed.
He only occupied a small part of the bed, but it was enough for Lu Zhao to hold his hand.
Lu Zhao gently rested his forehead on Xia Yu’s shoulder.
He didn’t fully lean on Xia Yu but seemed to be trying to draw some strength from him.
Lu Zhao whispered, “You don’t have to do anything. Just being here with me is enough.”
He held Xia Yu’s hand, their fingers intertwined.
“In these past few days when I didn’t see you, I missed you a lot. I shouldn’t have asked you about Xu Zhan, but I couldn’t help it. I got angry at myself afterward. I’m sorry. Don’t take it to heart.”
Xia Yu was stunned.
He hadn’t expected Lu Zhao to say this, let alone apologize to him.
His heart suddenly felt a pang of pain, as if someone had pressed a certain acupoint. He remembered Lu Yuan’s phone call, saying that Lu Zhao had called his name in his sleep. But even though Xia Yu had come, he hadn’t really helped Lu Zhao’s illness; instead, he had made him more miserable.
But even so, Lu Zhao was afraid of him leaving.
He thought that Lu Zhao’s bottom line had probably been gradually lowering ever since he agreed to be his lover.
“Okay,” Xia Yu replied.
Lu Zhao hugged Xia Yu a bit tighter. “Stay with me for a while,” he said after thinking for a moment. “I don’t have a fever anymore, and I’m not contagious.”
Xia Yu smiled, “I’m not worried about that.”
Lu Zhao reached out and touched Xia Yu’s earring, asking, “I’ve never seen you wear this earring before. Is it new?”
Xia Yu was taken aback, thinking that Lu Zhao wouldn’t notice such details. “Yes, I bought it with some colleagues a couple of days ago.”
They sat together, avoiding unpleasant topics, and Xia Yu listened as Lu Zhao complained about Lu Yuan, saying how annoying he was and how he acted like he was about to die every second. He talked about the many things happening at the company and even mentioned that he had overheard people in the company calling him a vampire.
Xia Yu couldn’t help but laugh.
Lu Zhao spoke without much expression, but Xia Yu found it amusing.
Lu Zhao had this talent. He could make him smile more than anyone else in the world.
With Lu Zhao leaning on his shoulder, Xia Yu touched the gauze on his hand and asked, “How did you get this?”
Actually, Xia Yu had noticed it earlier, but he felt awkward about asking. However, the hospital room was warm, and he felt drowsy, so he asked without thinking.
Lu Zhao pursed his lips, unsure of how to answer.
He had injured himself because he heard Xia Yu and Xu Zhan were planning to adopt a child.
It sounded ridiculous and pitiful, even to himself.
He calmly lied, “I got this while coming to the hospital, I accidentally broke a medicine bottle.”
Xia Yu frowned but didn’t suspect anything. “You’re really not careful.”
After chatting for a while, perhaps because the room was too warm, Xia Yu was now leaning against Lu Zhao and he unknowingly fell asleep.
Lu Zhao remained motionless, letting Xia Yu rest against him. At one point, Lu Yuan came in to give Lu Zhao some documents to sign, but before he even entered, he saw his brother’s cold glare and received a quiet signal to be quiet when he noticed Xia Yu on Lu Zhao’s shoulder.
Lu Yuan didn’t doubt it at all. If he dared to wake up Xia Yu, his brother would probably strangle him.
Lu Yuan’s lips twitched, and he quietly walked over, handed the documents, and left in a hurry.
But just before closing the door, he looked back.
His brother, gazing at Xia Yu and gently kissing his forehead.
It wasn’t even a kiss, but it felt infinitely tender.
Xia Yu slept for a while and woke up in the evening. He glanced at his phone and realized it was already 6 PM.
“Why is it so late? I should go,” Xia Yu struggled to sit up.
Lu Zhao had a separate suite inside the hospital room, which included a small bedroom. He suggested, “I have a separate room here. You can stay if you want.”
But Xia Yu shook his head. “No, I have things to do. If I have time in the next few days, I’ll come over.”
Lu Zhao said, “Sure,” but hesitated for a moment before adding, “Actually, I’ll be discharged from the hospital in a couple of days, so you don’t have to come.”
“I’ll drop by before you get discharged,” Xia Yu said, stopping Lu Zhao from offering to walk him out. “I’ll leave now; no need to see me off. I know the way.”
Lu Zhao didn’t insist.
After Xia Yu left, Lu Zhao stood by the window, looking down at the parking lot.
After Xia Yu left the building, he walked to the parking lot, found his car, and drove away. Although it was already late, the parking lot was well-lit, and Lu Zhao could see Xia Yu clearly.
He started coughing again.
As soon as Xia Yu left, Lu Zhao’s demeanor suddenly grew colder, his suppressed emotions unfathomable.
Even though they both didn’t smile, Xia Yu’s presence had softened him earlier, making him appear gentler. However, now that Xia Yu had left, he once again became as cold as ice.
Lu Yuan, standing nearby, watched all of this with an awkward feeling.
He whispered, “You can just call Xia Yu if you miss him. Why be so stubborn? It’s not embarrassing to appear vulnerable, Look, if I hadn’t called, you wouldn’t even have seen him today.”
Lu Zhao wasn’t in the mood to listen to Lu Yuan’s ramblings. He just wanted him to shut up. But eventually, he didn’t say anything.
He just wished that Xia Yu were his.
However, when Xia Yu had mentioned the possibility of adopting a child with Xu Zhan, Lu Zhao had felt a sudden pain in his chest, making it hard to breathe.
Maybe Xia Yu no longer loved him.
Lu Yuan continued talking, not receiving any response from Lu Zhao. He noticed that his brother seemed lost in thought, so he asked, “What are you thinking about?”
Lu Zhao still didn’t say anything.
He had just told Xia Yu that he shouldn’t bring up Xu Zhan while with him, but he wanted nothing more than to strangle Xu Zhan.
But doing so would probably hurt Xia Yu deeply.
After a while, Lu Zhao finally shifted his gaze away and asked Lu Yuan, “Do you think Xia Yu would like sapphires?”
Lu Yuan was puzzled. “Huh?”